I went back home after being at the hospital for nearly a month. I start school in a week and a half, and I didn't know what to feel. Or maybe how..
Hayden called everyday. The interactions between dad and I became more scarce each day. It hurt, but I knew what the consequences were. Dad wasn't going to change the way he felt any time soon, and neither was I, and I lost faith in miracles a while ago.
"If you need anything I'll be in my room, okay sweetie?" Mom says in a hushed voice by my doorway after tucking me into bed.
I nod, giving her a smile. I see her smile under the soft glow of my night light, before shutting my door.
I take my phone out, texting Hayden. He calls instead.
"Hey." I smile, picking at the fuzz on my sweater.
"Hi. How was the settle in?"
"Settled in good, I have successfully nested in bed without breaking a limb."
He chuckles, and then sighs.
"Where are you?" I ask, biting on the dry skin on my lip.
"At the hotel." He says in an obvious tone.
"Still? When are you moving back in to the apartment?"
"I actually uh...I lost the apartment."
"What? I'm so sorry, what are you gonna do now? Have you started looking?-"
"Zoey?" He chuckles again.
"Yeah.."
"I gotta go. Can I come see you tomorrow?"
I think for a moment.
"Yeah for about forty minutes exact. Dad and mom'll be out getting stuff for me. 4 o'clock."
"I'll be there."
"Okay." I smile, my heart warming.
"I love you." He says.
"I love you too."
The phone clicks off, and I put it down on my bedside table before switching my light off.
The smile only leaves my face as I fall into a dreamless sleep.
. . .
The next day I glance at the clock in a constant rhythm, watching the little hand tick by excruciatingly slow. By the time 3:45pm rolled round I'd apparently fallen asleep sometime along the way. My mother gently taps my arm until my eyes peel open.
"Hun we're leaving for the shops, be back in about an hour." She says before leaving.
I check my phone to see Hayden's text, stating he was on the way.
I slowly get up from my bed, walking over to my dresser to freshen up. I pop in two breath mints, spraying on some perfume and deodorant. I brush my hair and put some sheer pink lip gloss on. I limp back to my bed, trying my best not to put any pressure on the wound.
I sigh as my body relaxes against the bedding.
Hayden arrives at precisely 4:02pm.
He is dressed in a fitted pale blue button up shirt, and white kakis. His hair had their classic effortless 'just out of the shower' waves, and I could smell his cologne from where I laid.
"Hey gorgeous." He shoots me his glorious smile.
"Hi." Was all I managed as my smile grew instantly.
He gives me a single pale yellow rose and honeycomb chocolate, kissing my forehead.
"A man after my heart." I say dramatically, looking longingly at the chocolate.
"You look beautiful." He rolls my desk chair over. I scoff.
"Well I don't feel it." As my eyes examine his face closer, I realise he'd taken a beating.
"What happened to your face?" I ask in worry. He looks away, shaking his head.
"Nothing, I was being dumb and slipped down some stairs."
"Right. Hay what happened?"
"Baby nothing!" He laughs it off, and I let it go.
We talk about our weeks and how much we missed each other. We spent some time making out, glancing at the clock every now and then.
"Zoey...we need to talk." He looks at our entwined hands. My chest instantly tightens. Nothing good ever followed those words.
"What is it?" I say softly.
"I..I know I should've told you this sooner but I didn't know how or when-"
"Hay..what is it?" I squeeze his hand lightly. He sighs, shutting his eyes.
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"I'm not staying."
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"When." It felt like nothing in me was flowing. My blood, heart, lungs, nothing.
"Monday."
Three days. Fantastic.
"And you waited till-"
"I need you to move on, Z."
"No! You can't just waltz in here and fucking bail!"
"It's happening, Zoey." He gets up.
"Hayden! We're not done!" I try getting up but wince in pain.
"Don't." His voice was stern, and he tucks me back into bed.
Hot tears stream out of my eyes.
""Don't do this to me, Hayden you're all I have." I sob, and he starts crying too.
"I love you."
"If you did you wouldn't leave! Asshole!" I fling a pillow at him but he catches it.
"I love you, Zoey Simpson." He kisses me despite my efforts to keep him away, and I melt into his kiss, feeling icy as soon as he pulls away.
"Your parents will be here soon." He looks at his feet as he gets up, putting the chair back.
"Please don't leave."
"Goodbye Zoey." He looks at me with glassy, puffy eyes.
"No-" I cry, but he simply shuts the door behind him. I hear his heavy footsteps jog down the stairs and out the door. I hear his Jeep start up, the familiar sound of it's struggling engine buzzing.
