Love Won't Last Forever (Sequel to FWLF)

Chapter 18

Writting's been slow, bear with me guys it will pick up soon enough :) 

Enjoy! 

Chapter 18

 

“That’s it?” Vic asked me, not sounding like he believed what I had told him.

“That’s all that happened. He invited me in and we simply talked for about an hour. He didn’t see my mom and if he had then he doesn’t remember” I stated simply. It was such a struggle to lie to him like this. I couldn’t tell him about my mom either cause then he’d want to report… him, for what happened to my mother and it was just too much to handle right now. I’m already having a hard enough time not letting him touch me. After my shower he tried to kiss me and I flinched away, nearly slapping him in the face. Of course I just told him that I wasn’t feeling good and had an off night sleeping at my old house, to which he replied I should have just came home. But honestly, I didn’t want to be here anymore than I wanted to be at my old house. 

“Okay, okay. I just don’t understand why you couldn’t have come home after if nothing serious happened. You sure you’re alright?” he asked me again giving me a sympathetic look. I nodded my head, scared that if I spoke I would spill everything out or I would break down and cry. I gave him a fake smile to which he returned a small one. He knew something was upset, of course he did. But he can’t know what. If he continues to ask I can simply say it’s about my mother, he’d believe that. 

“Positive?” he urged me again, trying to get me to say what was on my mind.

I shrugged “I guess I just wish I knew what happened to my mom that’s all. I’m gonna take a nap, I didn’t get quite a good sleep over at my dad’s place” I said, implying I wanted him to leave. He was reluctant, obviously. He doesn’t like leaving me alone when im in my upset estate, but I wanted to be alone. More like needed to actually… He got up and left, not trying to touch me which I was thankful for. I don’t know how long I can avoid being close to him, but I’ll figure something out. I’ll work my lies if I have to, to avoid telling the truth. 

Sitting alone in the room on my bed didn’t feel any better than having Vic in here with me, in fact I actually kinda wanted to tell Vic to stay and sleep with me, but I couldn’t. So instead I sighed to myself and leaned back on the bed. Tears sprung to my eyes. I don’t understand why this had to happen to me. My life is completely fucked and nothing is ever going to be the same. I’m going to lose Vic, the love of my life. Our love life has always been a roller coaster and I didn’t know if we’d be able to come back down from this bump. I’ve been fucking raped, and I can’t even be in the same room as someone else for more than an hour without getting scared.

I leapt up from the bed while in thought. Drew was in here. He said he made a visit to the house, what if he planted cameras or bugs to listen to our conversation? How else would he find out I told Vic? With tears blurring my vision, I frantically pulled apart the room. I tried to find anything I could to see if something was hidden. Anything in fact. But the room was empty. Everything was normal in the room, well besides the fact it was now completely trashed due to my panic attack in trying to find anything hidden.  I wiped my eyes with the sleeve of my hoodie I had on. I stood there, in the center of the room, feeling empty. I was numb from head to toe. Every inch of my body was burned like my memories from him. I would never be the same Kellin again.

I dragged my feet across the floor as I made my way to the bathroom. I opened up the mirror cupboard and found my medication. I took 2 of them, washing them down with the odd tasting tap water. Leaning over the sink I washed my face with the water. Maybe he was lying. Maybe he hadn’t even been here; he just said that trying to scare me. Well, not trying, in fact succeeding, he had thoroughly scared me right to the core. I couldn’t tell Vic that much was for sure. He’d get angry at me for going alone, and then he’d blame himself for not coming and for not being more protective. Then he would get upset and plead me to tell the cops what happened. But most of all I don’t think I could handle the way Vic would treat me after.