Stealing Kisses

Chapter 23

Faith POV: 

I sit in the hall, unable to imagine walking back in the room. My foot taps on the linoleum as I hear someone walk out of Tim's room. Dan sits down beside me, patting my knee before taking a deep breath. He leans his head back against the wall as I stare at the nurses station. He sighs, watching me, before grabbing my hand. 

"Who is he to you?" Dan asks quietly. I continue to stare, trying to think of the perfect response. 

"I'm not sure." I admit quietly, my voice breaking. Dan nods, biting his lip as he tries to process this. "I never... We never..." I start, before shutting my eyes. "I didn't sleep with him." I let out, looking toward Dan. Dan nods, although I'm sure he doesn't believe me. "He was at the house... before he did it." I confess, feeling nauseous as I look down at my lap. 

"Why was he at the house?" Dan questions, trying not to sound upset. I turn toward him, grabbing his hand. 

"He was talking through the stabbing..." I lie, before continuing. "He kissed me...and... I just snapped." I let out, before forcing myself to breathe. "I told him that I'm happily married, and that I didn't want to mess with my marriage, but he did it anyways... But I snapped, and I really..." I struggle to catch my breath, feeling Dan rub my back slowly. "I'm the reason he did this... This is my fault." I croak out, watching Dan shake his head. 

"Babe, this is not your fault. You didn't force him to take the pills, or drink, or crash the car. That was all him." Dan asserts, as I lean my head against his shoulder. Part of me wants to tell him about the things we've seen, but he wouldn't understand. He'd probably send me to a mental ward... "I think you should head back in and keep him company." Dan says, before Rob comes barreling down the hall. 

"Where is he?" Rob asks, out of breath. We point to the room, causing him to rush in. I sigh, reluctantly following in after him. "I just got in from California and saw your message." He lets out, while looking down at Tim. "Fuck..." He releases under his breath, as I notice him tear up. He pulls up a chair and rests his hand on Tim's arm. He glances up at me, probably noticing how rigid I look. "You okay?" He asks, as I simply stare in response. 

Tim holds a brown paper bag, a bottle of whiskey inside. He takes a few drinks as he walks along the train track south of Nashville, stumbling a bit. He's twenty-six, and just learned that his label was considering dropping him after his debut album flopped. He kicks around the gravel along the tracks, trying to think of what his future might entail. 

He could go back to school, but he doesn't have the money. He could move back home, but he doesn't have money. He could stay in Nashville, but yet again, he doesn't have the money. He could pick up another job on the side, but Nashville is far too expensive to work entry-level and live downtown. He could move out of town a little, but without a car, he'd have no way to get to work. He's at a dead end as far as possibilities. 

He hears a distant train, causing him to stop and look for it. He spots the light of the train in the distance, taking another swig of his whiskey. He glances down at the tracks he stands on, seeing a solution to his problem. He chugs the whiskey, feeling the roar of the train grow closer. He tosses the empty bottle, before looking up, as if to ask for forgiveness. 

"Hey!" Someone screams from a nearby parking lot. "Get off the tracks!" They continue to scream, as Tim ignores them. He turns toward the train, watching its light grow brighter. He clenches his fists, shutting his eyes as he prepares for it to hit. "Hey!" The voice continues to scream. 

Tim feels impact, but from the side. The train's whistle blares, as Tim hits the ground, feeling dazed as he wonders why he isn't stuck to the front of a freight train. The ground rumbles under him, as a man stands over him, doubled over and panting. 

"Are you fucking crazy?" The man shouts, trying to catch his breath. Tim stares at the man, before looking at the train, still trying to gather together the pieces. "Hey!" The man shouts down at him, as Tim leans his head back into the gravel. 

"You should've let me be." Tim lets out, as the man notices how defeated Tim is acting. He reaches out a hand toward Tim, pulling him up to his feet. He brushes him off, before clearing his throat. 

"Are you hurt?" He asks, while Tim shakes his head, looking completely hollow. "My name's Rob." He lets out, causing Tim's eyes to shift. Tim remains silent, still in shock. "Why don't we go get you something to eat, alright?" Rob suggests, guiding him toward downtown. 

I feel myself jump a little, as I shut my eyes, struggling to admit this actually must've happened. I slowly glance up toward Rob, hugging myself for a moment. 

"How'd you meet Tim?" I ask, hoping it's not true. Rob looks up at me, wincing ever so slightly. He clears his throat before looking down at Tim. 

"I bumped into him downtown." He answers vaguely, confirming that it is, in fact, true. I sit down across from Rob, hanging my head as I feel tears rise. 

"Why does he keep doing this?" I question, feeling a few tears fall. Rob frowns, holding back tears of his own. 

"I don't know..." He lets out under his breath. He stands up and leaves the room, causing my eyes to follow him. I carefully walk out behind him, watching him walk down the hall until finding an area that is damn near vacant. He turns toward me, before taking a deep breath. "He's scared." He says, his voice a little shaky. "He's scared, and he's alone, and that's the worst feeling on earth. And he just wants it to stop." He explains, making me cringe. He pants a little, like the words winded him. "I've asked him the same damn thing, and he'll never admit it, but that's what it is." He says, before starting back toward his room, leaving me standing in the hall.