The Love Of An Alpha

26 | "Please"

First of all, I'm so sorry for missing two update days. I will try my best to update on the Mondays, but I just have to think this whole story through, since I have decided what the ending should be.

Oh and thanks for the 1k reads🎊❤️!!!

Have fun reading!

~*~

I quickly changed into a bathrobe and tried my best to ignore the burning stare of my mate. My back was turned to him, but I could still watch him through the mirror. I stared at his reflection when he met my gaze.

Within seconds he was behind me with his face buried in my neck. ''Mate,'' he stated, his voice sounded darker and in some sort of way distracted. His arms were possessively wrapped around my waist and the tingly feeling made my body somewhat relax, but at the same time tense.

I closed my eyes and for the first time in hours, the burning heat wasn't radiating from my body anymore and I was thankful for it. I leaned into his touch and threw my head back against him, letting out an appreciated sigh.

His grip tightened. ''Are you OK?'' he asked with a voice as soft as silk.

I only managed to let out a ''mmhmm''.

''You wanna lay down?''

Again the same answer.

Zeron scooped me up in his arms and carried me to the bed. He laid me down on the bed gently and followed afterwards. Pulling me on top of him, I had my cheek pressed against his chest. His heartbeat was far from steady and throbbed rapidly. The hands he had at first on either sides of my hips, were replaced on the small of my back as me pressed my chest further against his.

I had no idea how to feel. On one side, I wanted to be thankful for him being here, but on the other side, I wanted to be mad at him for leaving me on my own in the first place. My body wanted him to make love to me and fulfil the purpose of the heat, while I knew I wasn't ready for it.

It was confusing. I was confusing.

I had no idea what I wanted. I had been giving him so many mixed signals that even I lost track of what I wanted. I didn't know anymore if leaving was worth the heartbreak of losing a mate. I didn't know anymore if simply leaving everything behind, was going to solve anything.

''What are you thinking about?'' asked Zeron, while rubbing circles with his thumb on my clothed back. ''If you want to know, I'm thinking about how I don't want to mess things up right now. One wrong step and you'll go back to avoiding me and giving me your endless rants about you being unhappy with me. I don't want that. It breaks my heart to hear that you are unhappy with me and every time after that I reconsider if I'm making the right choice to not let you go, because I know that that will be even worse.'' He was silent for a moment. ''I just want you to know that I try my best to prevent anything to happen while your heat. I try my best to fight back my instincts to act on to the heat, because I'll not make any mistakes this time. I really don't want to loose you.''

I didn't know how to react to that. My mind went blank and I just stared to the wall ahead of me. I felt my body go tens and wanted to wait for his response to that, but on the other hand I wanted to say something. Anything. Just to comfort him a little, since I got the weird need to comfort him. To give him a hug and hold him tight.

Not being able to stand the urge, I turned around in his arms and wrapped mine around him, burying my face in his chest. ''I'm sorry,'' I told him out of nowhere. ''I- It's just that I can't decide. I'm too bad at making decisions. It's a habit of mine to think through everything and see every bad side of the decisions. I thought that leaving had least cons, but I was wrong. So, so wrong. I'm just not ready to leave everything behind. Not for ever anyways.''

His hold on me tightened and his fingers stroked soothingly over my back.

''And that's one of the reasons why I want to visit other packs. I want to know if they are really better than here.''

Then he tensed. ''What?'' he stumbled.

I could basically feel his eyes burning on me. With much afford, I created some distance between us, although my body screamed for the contact with its mate. Staring at him straight into the eye, I continued my reasoning. ''Lilly would come along with me and after we visited everything we want to visit, we will come back. I can promise you that much.''

His expression dropped and he stared back at me with a dead expression. ''And let me guess, I can't come along? I'm sorry if this hurts your feelings, but I don't really trust your promises. You left me once already -well, you at least tried to. Why would I believe your word when you say that you will come back?''

I lowered my gaze, just to avoid his facial expressions. The hurt was written everywhere. ''How many times have you seen the fresh white snow? How many times have you seen the pearl white beaches? The deep forests on the island of Ambition? Probably several times. You must know the beauty of the world behind the borders of this pack. There must be something inside of you that understands me. I see why you won't trust me on my word, but I would swear on Cain that I'll come back. Lilly won't let me break that promise, her loyalty is yours and will probably always be yours.''

''And what if I agreed? How long would you stay away? How long will I have to miss you from my side?'' he sounded desperate.

I was silent for a while. ''Maybe a year? Two? I don't know. The Eight Lands are big and there are a lot of worthy places to be visited.'' My voice was barely a whisper. I was slightly afraid of his response.

''A year or two?'' he shouted out in surprise. ''You want me to let you leave for two whole damn years? Are you out of your mind? Please don't be serious right now. Just come lie down again and we will talk about this after your heat. It probably is getting to your head again.''

I was stunned. ''No,'' I spoke, frowning my eyebrows together. ''I'm in a perfect state of mind, thank you very much. But fine, if you think that I am not, we'll talk about this later. But know one thing, I won't forget it. This plan won't escape from my mind in the near future.''

His arms found my waist again and he pulled me against him again. ''If you want it so badly, we'll talk about it after your heat,'' he murmured into my ear. He nibbled a little on my ear and slowly kissed his way down my neck. A pleasurous feeling shot through my body, a mixing of the made bond and the heat.

With a lot of afford, I managed to push his head away from  my neck. Trying to distract him with something else, I brought the nearing visit of Alpha Constatine up.

Zeron sighed. ''If I had known you would have your heat, I would have never let him cross the borders of this pack. He may be an Alpha of the Balance Pack, but he is also an unmated male wolf. That and his Alpha titel make him competition. No one in this pack I would consider as competition, but an Alpha of another pack is. Please promise me that you won't go near to him when you don't have to. And even if the situation demands it, don't go without me. He will too feel the pull of the heat and if anything goes wrong, it would cause rivalry between another pair of packs. Can you please promise me this one thing?''

I huffed. ''Just moments ago, my promise was nothing worth and now all of a sudden it is? But sure. If it makes you sleep better at night, I'll promise you that I won't go anywhere near Alpha Constatine.''

''Thank you,'' he told me, making it clear in his voice that he appreciated my obedience. He moved me so I could face him. I looked at him through my eyelashes. And then he muttered: ''Fuck this heat.'' Afterwards, he pulled me close and pressed his lips against mine.