lack of

goo

there is this distant tugging in the back of my head.
something pulling my head back until i fall down.
pulling and dragging with such urgent force that i have no choice but to be taken away.
it hurts, quite a bit.
i've got a fairly sized head ache and can't breathe quite correctly.
the gunk in my chest inflates and squeezes out every last bit of air i had in my lungs.
the everlasting void travels through my body till it reaches my throat.
i've got a pain in mind and a hurt scream wanting- begging to be heard.
for one night only, all i wanted was to sink into my comfortable blankets, but i gues they were never that warm.
i want this tugging rope to drag me into the darkness already.
to finally take me down and let me sleep forever.
to finally let the candle blow out,
and let the dim light be gone.
i'm over it.
over this whole dealing with pain thing.
i'm tired.

November 30th, 2019