So Far Away ~

15

"Namjoon, and Jhope."

I've been watching them for the longest and they didn't check to see if anyone was watching them as they stuffed, what looked like, realistic fake insects in someone's locker.

Jhope jumped in the air so high at the sound of my voice, I had to stop myself from clapping because of how impressed I was.
Namjoon, on the other hand, had the nerve to look guilty.

"Whose locker?" I asked, before they could say something cliche like "it's not what it look like."

Namjoon scratched his head, looking embarrassed. "Jin's locker. BUT-."

"It's not what it looks like." Jhope finished, stuffing the rest of the insects in Jin's locker. "I need to see worldwide handsome lose his cool for once."

"And you feel the same too?" I looked at Namjoon. He shook his head, and simply said, "I just thought it would be funny. You're not going to snitch are you?"

"Rena isn't the type to snitch. She probably doesn't care enough." Jhope hit the hammer right on the nail.

"I don't care, you're right. But I need to tell Tae to get here to see. He would love this." I grinned as I pulled out my phone. "You guys are going to be his heroes. Tell me how he reacts, ok?"

I waited until I was at my usual spot, the library where I texted Jin to let him know what Namjoon and Jhope were planning. What can I say? I couldn't let Jin go down like that. He was worldwide handsome.

"Ah, I knew I'd find you here."

"I think you're following me." I said, glancing at Yoongi. He shrugged his shoulders and sat down across from me. "You're a lot better than this lil meow meow."

He reached over and thumbed my hand that was laying on the table. "I came to ask you if you'd like to go to this interactive museum with me this Saturday. But if you do say yes, We'll have to cram in a lot of research for our project on Wednesday. That way we won't get too far behind."

He had this carefully planned out. "Wait, why are you inviting me? You actually want to be around me?" I asked, confused. I knew that we were friends by now. But this was Yoongi.

He gave me a deadpanned look. "I'm starting to wonder about you. I really am." He sighed. "I could've texted or called you but I walked all the way from A building to C building to get to the library to ask you. If I didn't want to be around you, then I wouldn't have asked you."

"Excuse me for double checking." I asked, offended by his childish tone. "When Namjoon invited me out, I was surprised too. We barely know each other."

He gave me a look I couldn't decipher and leaned in towards me as he started to stand up. "Do me a favor and not compare me to your parents or anyone else." He winked at me and stood up straight. "I'll always remember you because I plan on having you around me."

With that, he left.

He left me with a thousand thoughts running through my head. The main one being, what the hell does he mean by that?

GROUPCHAT WITH TAY & TAE

renaisSleep: ????
renaisSleep: guys i think yoongi was flirting with me and idk how i feel about it

LeoTaedo: feel happy

Tayisdestruction: he's always flirting with you tho duhh

LeoTaedo: she's so slow @ taylor

Tayisdestruction: ikr. BIG BIG DUMB @ taehyung

renaisSleep: ... but it's yoongi. my enemy. the devils son. the one i disliked since i don't remember when i started to dislike him, i just know i did

renaisSleep: he's way too nice. i thought he was mean this entire time

Tayisdestruction: i think you do like him but you're mean to him to keep him at a distance so you won't end up hurting him, like a defense mechanism

renaisSleep: maybe it's a reason why i always mark second after him, i don't pay attention enough to a lot of things it seems

I put my phone in my bag, ignoring the vibrations. I needed fresh air. I could feel my skin start to feel clammy. I sense a panic attack trying to come on.

I was overthinking with my emotions. Yoongi, maybe liking me was a little overwhelming. I was still learning that I wasn't a terrible person that I had made myself to be. I was a caring person like everyone else and I was capable of loving but I wasn't all the way there yet. What if Yoongi confessed to me? Not even Yoongi, what if anyone did? I would only hurt them right now because I wasn't in the space to love them back like they should be. I'd feel a like monster all over again.

I stepped outside and let out the breath I was holding.

It only felt worst because I think Taylor was right. I think I was developing a crush on Yoongi. Somehow freaking Min Yoongi wormed his way into my space, and took over, little by little.

But I didn't deserve someone like him.

I needed to get better mentally. I shouldn't think like this, I have to do better for myself. I should be able to feel like I deserve someone like Yoongi.