The Wonty Bible

Make It Stop

"Can we not fight, please?" Monty asked. His voice was quiet but Winston still heard it. Monty was exhausted with school and sports to even speak up. The argument was mostly one sided.

"I just wanted to know why your hanging out with that rapist!" Winston yelled at him. Monty knew he had no reason so he stayed quiet. Winston furrowed his eyebrows and walked out of the locker room. Everyone had already gone home.

Monty didn't like to change in front of people; fearing others would ask about his scars. So that's why he was always last to leave.

Winston was right though. He shouldn't talk to the guy who raped girls for fun. Winston was always right.

Monty didn't know why he always listened to Winston. Maybe it was because everyone treated like a bomb waiting to go off but Winston used the same sass to him as everyone else. Or maybe it was because he liked Winston. He liked to boy to the point it would hurt. It would hurt when they would fight and Winston wouldn't talk to him for days. Those days made Monty physically sick. He couldn't leave his bed without feeling like he was going to vomit. His body would feel heavy. It was better to stay in bed then try to leave the room and having to walk past his drunk father. He didn't want his body to have more scars because his dad couldn't control himself.

Monty went to school and Winston didn't even glance at him.

He tried to give him notes or walk with him in the halls but Winston either threw it away or walked the other way.

Monty felt his world go darker than before. He left school early and told his coach he was sick. He knew he was taking a lot of sick days but he couldn't help it. Winston was fighting with him more and more. Each time Monty would get worse and worse.

He snuck throw his window and locked the door so his dad wouldn't barge in. Winston slide off his shoes and laid in his bed; not wanting to change. His closed his eyes and fell asleep.

He woke up to the sun going down. He decided he should at least cover himself up. He tried to lift his arms but they wouldn't move. It began to frustrate him. He let out a small sigh and closed his eyes again.

His body felt in pain. His chest felt like it was going to collapse making it hard to breathe. His body felt heavy; adding more weight to his collapsing chest.

He wished he was normal and everything wouldn't hurt. He wanted to be able to smile at the world without getting scared people would laugh at him. He wished he would have friends that actually cared. He wished his family loved or even appreciated him. Mostly, he wished Winston would like him.

He rolled to his side and looked at the wall. Seeing all these pictures of his mom and sister hanging on the wall. A few art projects his sister made when she was younger where scattered around the wall too. Some where framed and some only had tape holding them up.

He sniffled and closed his eyes. Wrapping his arms around himself and curled up into a ball.

He hated fighting with Winston but it made him think about all his mistakes in life. Being in the same room with no outside contact helped with his brain bringing up past endeavors.

He thought about how he treated his mother and sister. They didn't need his cold shoulder. Now, they don't talk to him. Leaving him all alone with his thoughts.

The long days past and Monty got the strength to go back to school. This time he would try not to talk to anyone that was being investigated. He didn't want to be pulled into that and he also didn't want Winston to ignore him again.

He walked into the school and felt pressure returning to his chest. He walked through the halls hoping to see Winston. He was surprised when he didn't receive a single text from him. He saw him but with another boy. They where standing but the lockers. Winston was smiling and blushing. He never made Winston react like that. He sighed and left to class.

He decided school might not be worth it anymore. It just stressed him out and everyone was just talking about what she said or what he did and all this information caused his brain to go haywire. He tried to stay calm and focus on what the teacher was saying but the words blurred together. Everyone looked at him and laughed. Everyone laughed and laughed. He closed his eyes and tried the breathe. He opened them again and everything was normal. The teacher was standing by the board and the students where writing in the notebooks.

He couldn't take it so he ran out the class. Everything was confusing and suffocating. He needed more space to breathe. He went to the boys locker room and sat in the bench.

His head in his hands as he slouched forward. He felt his chest lighten and oxygen going back into his lungs. He stayed like that until he heard the door open. He looked up and saw Winston.

"Hi" Monty forced a smile.

"You okay? The teacher asked me to check up in you" Winston spoke with little emotion. Monty began to get anxious. His chest getting heavier by the second.

"Yeah, don't worry about it"

"I know it probably not a good time to talk about this but I can't hold it in" Winston sat beside his and looked at his hands.

"What is it?" Monty asked.

"I don't think we should be friends anymore"

Just like that all the weight he tried to fight off came crashing down on him.

"What do you mean?"

"I just can't deal with this. And I've met someone who also agrees with me. I know you always leave for days and days. I don't know what you do or where you go. I don't know if you do bad things"

Monty didn't know what to say. He thought Winston was different. He thought Winston trusted him enough. He didn't think Winston thought so low of him. He didn't even want to know who he was talking to about this. Monty thought Winston would always be there for him. Keep his secrets for him.

"I...I take sick days because I feel terrible" Monty said quietly. Winston looked at him. Wondering what had gotten into to the boy.

"At first it wasn't that bad. I could get out of bed and do normal things. It was just that I would feel like shit. I thought it was normal. But then the investigation started and we would fight more so it kinda made it worse," Monty tried to smile. He didn't want Winston to feel bad but he couldn't stop. "Then I caught feelings for you so it hurt more. I can't get out of bed or even make it to school. Everything just hurts. My whole body hurts" Monty was crying now. He cover his face with his hands. Not wanting to look pathetic. His fathers words always echoed in his mind.

"Please make it stop" he whimpered. Winston gave him a sad look and pulled him into a hug. Monty held his tight against him; afraid he wasn't real. He sobbed into his shoulder.

Finally letting it all out.

Monty calmed down after a few minutes. He felt embarrassed and left Winston alone in the locker room. He felt fucking stupid. He shouldn't had said anything. Now Winston going to worry.

He left school and decided to drive around. His body still ached. He thought it would get better if he told Winston but it just made him feel guilty.

He went to his secret spot above a hill that looked down on the town. He stayed in the car and laid back against his seat. He was so tired.

Maybe if he slept forever he wouldn't be so tired.