since the 5th grade

Chapter 8

Ashton takes me to his room and closes the door behind him.

He looks at me. "Do you want it open?" He asks.

"It doesn't matter." I tell him.

He shrugs and takes a seat on his bed. He pats the space next to him.

I walk over and sit awkwardly next to him.

"What happened to your cheek?" He asks.

"What do you mean?" I asked confused.

"Its bruised." He looks at me, concerned.

I feel my cheek. Ouch, that wasn't a good idea. I guess my mom had managed to bruise my cheek.

"My mom slapped me." I tell him.

"Your moms a little bitch, you know that? Of course you know that." He shakes his head as if he had just said something really stupid.

I let out a small giggle.

He smiles at me and randomly boops my nose.

"What are you doing?" I laugh.

"I just want to make you smile, is that okay?" He asks, looking into my eyes.

I nod.

"Ashton could I ask you something?" I tell him.

"Of course." He says with a giggle.

"Do you think I... deserve all of this. Do you think I deserve this shitty life? Do you think its my fault?" I ask him. I could feel the tears building up in my eyes.

He takes me hands in his. "Of course not, Julie. Don't you ever say that again, okay? Remeber this. An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backwards. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means its going to launch you into something great. So take a deep breath and keep aiming." He finishes off with a smile. "I really want you to be happy, Julie."

I sigh. "But sometimes it feels like that arrow will never be shot."

"Do you think love is a mistake?" I ask him. I didn't get why I was getting this personal.

"Love? A mistake? No. Why? Do you think love is a mistake?" He asks.

"I'm starting to think it is." I say.

"Well sometimes you just have to laugh at your mistakes." Ashton says.

"I have laughed at my mistakes, but lately, I've been laughing so hard that its starting to sound like screams."

He gives me a confused look.

"You seem tired. Do you want to rest?" He asks me. Concern in his voice.

"No, I'm not tired." I tell him. I hadn't been tired since this love had taken over me.

"Can I ask you one last thing, Ashton?" I tell him.

"Anything." He tells me.

"Would you hate me if I tried to kill myself?" What the hell was I talking about now. I wasn't supposed to be talking about this was Ashton.

"I would never hate you. But why would you try to kill yourself?" He asks me.

"You told me you wanted me to be happy." I whisper. "Didn't you?"

"Yeah." He sighs. "But I don't want you to be happy like that. I want you to be genuinely happy in this world. If you need someone to make you happy. I'll be that person."

~~~

helloooo

is this considered a cliffhanger or???

double update bc ily guys so much ayye

i know some of you guys might feel like this is turining into an ashton fanfic but trust me, its not. this is literally just the start of some major luke drama.

so anyways tell me how you feel about this part.

dont forget to vote ayye

and like always ily all to pieces xx