WHEN IT RAINS

XVII

I am a shitty person.

Whenever I see Jimin, perhaps in the distance or meeting his eyes as we're about to cross in the halls, my heart begins to race and a shock courses my veins. I quickly fix my hair, adjust the scrubs on me in a split second in hopes of looking a bit presentable.

And when we're close enough to speak, I sneak in a light touch on his forearm. Perhaps I purposely bit my lip to gain his attention or I'll let a rosy blush paint my cheeks when I get just a bit closer. Lowering my voice, I stage it so it's like we're in out own bubble.

When he walks off, I'm still staring at his back, watching his muscles ripple under his scrubs. He always looks back, bottom lip between his teeth before he catches me looking and he smiles, letting his supple lip slip between his shiny teeth. God, I miss him.

But when he's gone, my heart skips because this is so wrong and Jimin knew it. It was what he called 'harmless flirting' while him and Nora were in a relationship.

I always hated that. Harmless flirting. But the tables have turned, and this harmless flirting was what I looked forward to at work. It was my means of getting him back.

But if there was a chance, I was taking it. And there was.

Tonight at seven, Park's place for a little hang out.

*

Riding in the passenger's seat of Jimin's car brought back memories of our mini adventures.

Typically, after long shifts, it would take much convincing to get him to stay over at his place. The roads were soaked in a fog at such time, and our drive would last a bit longer than usually since he was always a cautious driver. But I loved the drive. His hand crawled up my thigh, holding me because I was his girl while he sang out the lyrics to his favorite song.

Other times, our shifts ended just before the sunset. Giddy, we'll order from the nearest fast food restaurant and order to go. The drive home was the funniest as Jimin's hand tightens around my thigh, him playfully growling as he hovered over the steering wheel to complain about the slow driver ahead of him.

Finally at his place, we'd run to his bedroom, lousily changing into his comfy clothes before crawling on his bed. The large glass window in his room was open, allowing for the golden sunset rays to stream in like beams of light.

The gaze Jimin gave me was anything but mediocre. It made my heart melt and stomach flutter. The last colors of the sunset would fade from the skies, the final goodbye beam caught his mirror and reflected a rainbow on his cheek.

I smiled, brushing my hands over it before it disappeared as quickly as it appeared. The rest of the night was ours, doing whatever the hell we wanted because it was the period where everything was honey and gold. Sweet and rich in our developing feelings.

But now it was this. Whatever this was.

The silence in his car was welcoming, however. It was like this until I noticed his Polaroid on his dashboard, catching me by surprise as I take it in my hand.

"You shouldn't leave your Polaroid exposed to the sun," I tease, knowing he knew this. "It could cause a color shift."

Jimin's expression was stoic as the back of his index finger brushed the tip of his nose as a habit of his. His expression morphed into a soft smile and he let out a chuckle.