Two Thousand Miles Away

Chapter 13

Ella

New Years Eve is always a great time to get drunk, party, and hook up with random guys that you don't know. And that was just what I wasn't going to do tonight. I let Dad and Mike go out. I was going to stay home and babyset Grayson and Rocky.

In the middle of watching Bolt I received a text from Ben. It was the first one this week. You should come out tonight with me: Ben wrote.

I sighed, wishing I could go out, not because I wanted to, but because I missed Ben. So I decided to call my dad. "Hey Ella," he said when he answered.

"Can you come home? I kinda wanna go out with some friends." I felt a little bad about making my dad come home when I said he could go out but just not bad enough to make him not do it. I'd been the mom long enough.

My dad agreed and a half hour later I was in my room trying to make myself party worthy. I put on a short, black skirt with a tight, light blue sweater. On my feet there were heeled boots. I think I looked good. As I walked down the stairs my shoes made little clicks as they hit the wood. "Dad?" I called out.

"In the kitchen!" he yelled. I walked into the small kitchen. My dad had brought leftovers for Grayson. I ruffled my little brother's hair as I snuck by him and grabbed a fry. "You look nice. Where ya going tonight?"

I grabbed my purse from the counter to give myself a few moments to come up with an answer. "Some friends of mine invited me to a party. I'm gonna stay at their house tonight."

"What friends?" If somebody didn't know my father as well as I did they might think that he was just trying to make conversation. I knew that he was trying to detect holes in my story.

"Lucila. Megan," I stated, naming off people he knew that I once hung out with. I played with my charm bracelet, trying to avoid eye contact. We were friends back before Lucila started to date the football player who cheated on Megan. That stupid football player broke up our whole gang. Now they won't even look at me or each other.

Dad scratched his head and frowned. "Okay...I guess."

"Thanks. See you tomorrow."

***

The music was loud in my ears as Ben dragged me through the crowd all night. It was after one AM and I was drunk. About five minutes ago Ben pulled me over to a corner of the living room. People were dancing and grinding all around us. Ben and I started to make out in that same corner.

Ben pulled away from me. "My parents aren't home if you wanna come over to my place." He then shrugged. "If not, I'm sure we could find a spare bedroom in this place."

I grabbed the collar of his letter jacket and started to fiddle with it. I concentrated on his jacket alone. I was suddenly exhausted. I wanted to go home and watch a movie with my brothers. But I knew what I'd signed up for when I came here. "Your place," I answered.

Ben walked straight out of the house with me on his tail. He ignored people as they tried to stop him in order to start a conversation.

When we were outside he grabbed my hand and started to act somewhat like a gentleman. He even opened my car door.

At his house, he seemed like a happy child, sprinting to my side of the car so he could open the door. As soon as his front door was shut and I was inside the house, Ben had wrapped himself around me. In the entryway he'd already taken off my shirt. Our clothes were littered around the house; my shoes were on the stairs, his shirt lying somewhere in the upstairs hallway, my skirt was against his door.

I collapsed onto his bed and he walked over to it. On the way he undid his belt and dropped his shorts somewhere. Everything after that felt like I was in a daze. I was just going through the motions. Relief flooded my system when Ben rolled over next to me. It was over. In minutes Ben was asleep.

I sighed before sitting up. Then I grabbed my undergarments off the floor. After walking over to Ben's closet, I grabbed a shirt to sleep in. Ben rolled over, taking my spot in his bed. I pushed him over before lying down and burying myself in his sheets. I wanted to disappear from the world.
A person shouldn't feel this way after having sex with their boyfriend. They should be happy or giddy. I wanted to cry.

Grabbing my phone, I went to my messages. My thumb lingered over Jacob's number. I put my phone down. This was my problem, not his.

Gabby's words floated through my head. '"You're a smart, beautiful girl with a big heart. Do you really want to spend the rest of high school with a guy who isn't even trying to be a good boyfriend, let alone a good person?"'

She was right. This thing with Ben needed to end.