Grace To Grass. (A Nigerian Story.)

12.

They say when you've done something bad, you tend to feel guilty. But, in my case I didn't just do something bad, I screwed up 100%.

And the worst thing was.....

There was no taking it back.

I stared into oblivion, as I would put it, and not our maths teacher giving us tips on how to tackle objective question in less than a minute.

I recalled my life before, countless of times, remembering the old days of secondary school. Those days where I had no worries, and the only one I got was, what new assessories could I try out with my uniform, those days where I was called 'The girl who wore heels to school' , 'The hot stuff', 'Sexy mama's and so on.

The days where I didn't have to worry about pimples picking on my face, my exams coming up or how I was going to face my newest problem of how I kissed my closest friend.

Yeah exactly.

I still remember how I hardly read and still made top of the class, but right now, things seem to fall to the opposite.

Thinking about it my life has gone from 90% down to a whole 10% control.  The reason, I don't know.

"Azraa come and solve this example based on the theory I just gave you all" my name was the thing to have brought me back to reality.

Wait what?

What theory?

I turned to face Aisha, the girl next to me and then back to the teach and back again to Aisha, who was inwardly laughing and trying not to burst out.

"We don't have much time" Mr wale said as I opened my mouth to say something but I closed it instantly.

"Sir I didn't get the explanation well, I....don't know how to solve it in less than one minute" I told him truthfully as I stood up

"Were you even listening? Azraa, this one you're becoming unserious all of a sudden, this is not the time to play, or any of you. Your exams are around the corner and I'm teaching and you're telling me there's nothing you can do out of it"

"No, I didn't say I can't do it, I just can't do it in less than a minute" I told him back.

One thing I hate was to have my words being twisted back.

The whole class remained silent, as embarrassment was slowly seeping through.

"Tighten your seatbelt azraa, I know you're better than this, but I don't understand what's wrong with you lately" he said and I felt like the ground should just open up and swallow me whole and then, they would have a new thing to talk about and not my current unseriousness. 

He took his marker back from me and I went back to sit, this time trying to concentrate better.

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I avoided Karan like a plague, and the only time I saw him physically  he would look at me and I would turn my face away.  I even froze my whatsapp so as not to talk to him.

But how long could I do that?

Rather,  how long OK my could I keep it up, without someone fishing out something?

School was finally over and we had our lunch, washed and did other things before we were called out for sports.

I liked this time of the week, where we would go out and play sport, while enjoying ourselves. But,  at this moment I dreaded it.

Why?

One reason.

Karan.

To look at it, how does he expect me to act, we freaking kissed, and he acts as though nothing even happened, or wanting me to behave normal like we didn't just feel each others lips.