Short Stories

Double Life

I imagine that sometimes, double agents loose track of their secret lives. I wonder if they think of themselves like super heroes. I know I'm no hero. I'd like to be. To be able to swoop down and save people using my powers of flight or telekinesis or teleportation. I could save people and fix things. Fix all the things. Make everyone happy. Lying is hard though. Even if its to protect people or yourself. Sometimes you have to make a choice and to do so you may loose things you love. You might loose people or a bond or the last cookie. It can feel draining. The fear of loosing someone you love so dearly. Someone who's gotten so close to you that the idea of not seeing or talking to them again makes you sick. 

I know I cant have everything. I know I cant but I still want to. Every step I take everything I share is a step closer to a happy ending. We have to be careful. Superheroes protect those they love, they help everyone around them no matter what.

I wonder what that would be like. To know everything you are doing right now is going to fix everything. Every questionable step. Every heart-stopping close call. Every time I suppress my tears because big kids don't cry. I don't cry. I protect and I help and I fix. 

Its all for a brighter future. A future where I can love you. Where we can see the lights. Where we can make late breakfasts after late nights messing around. Where we can raise kids to be who they are no matter what. Where they wont be afraid. Where we can cry and we can laugh.

Every step I take. Every move I make. To a fairytale castle with a Rolls Royce in the driveway and a princess in a blue dress with a lace collar.

I love you baby...and if its quite alright I need you baby...to warm the lonely nights...I love you baby...trust in me when I say...oh pretty baby...don't bring me down I pray...oh pretty baby...now that I found you stay...and let me love you baby let me love you...