Don't love someone too deeply
Until you're sure that the other person loves you with the same depth
Because the depth of your love today is the depth of your wound tomorrow
Chaeyoung : No ! No I'm not letting you " think " for one month again . I'm done and scared. Blackpink is done already because of Jen's death .
Jisoo : ok now Rosie I love you but stop saying that , stop talking like that she's not gone . Ok ? She's not .
Chaeyoung: She fucking is ! It's time for you to accept that . Stop acting like everything is okay Jisoo it's not . Stop wearing Jennie's clothes , you're hurting yourself and everybody around you . You're not " thinking " you just want to forget about all the messed up things that are happening and Jisoo I swear I understand that you're not doing fine okay ? I totally get it but we need you to talk to us ok ?
I glanced at Lisa who was looking down to her feets then Jungkook who was listen to us this whole time . I couldn't talk .
Chaeyoung : Please don't leave , we need you . We fucking need you .
Jisoo : What about Taehyung..
Chaeyoung : Not him again ... Jisoo I thought we agreed on you guys breaking up . This relationship will be the last straw . This will definitely be the end of our career .
Jisoo : How is this related to you guys ?
Chaeyoung : Don't you ever listen to the manager ?
My eyebrows frowned .
Chaeyoung : You know why Taehyung never cared about you guys going public at first ? Let me tell you . He ain't have any problem. Bts ain't going to fall because of that . We are . Bts is fine , they're men and increase in the industry. We are not . Blackpink is gone all we can hope for is for a solo career . That plan of you guys going public was supposed to be a short period of time it's over now .
I stayed silent in front of her , trying to think properly. She was exhausted and I could see that through her face . I know that she is scared , music is her life . She doesn't want blackpink to downfall even more now. She was waiting for me to look at her back but I couldn't.
Chaeyoung : you're being selfish right now soo .
Lisa : Hey Chaeyoung calm down .
Chaeyoung: Calm down ? You guys really think that I didn't hear you talking about quitting everything ? I know you know what you want to do know but are too afraid to tell me what's up ? Are you going to abandon me too ? Just like Jennie did ?
Lisa : Chaeyoung let's go out a little.
I was trying to stay calm too , trying not to cry , not to scream at her for acting this way Jungkook approached me with a serious face .
Jungkook : What are you going to do ?
Jisoo : Should I break up with him already ?
Jungkook : Look i don't know ... what do you think ?
I got up ready to do the dishes .
Jisoo : You know what pisses me off ? Everybody seems to be counting on me no matter what happens . Since Jennie 's ..... I paused nobody asked me what i was feeling . If i needed help except for Taehyung and you . And nobody seems to care now . All I want is too get far from here . I want to leave . This is so fucking unfair . Like what the fuck should I do now ?
I started crying.
Jisoo : I'm so mad at jennie for doing this . Why did she leave me ? Like WHY ? And why is she so obsessed about me breaking up with him ?
Anger started to grow, i thought that I was hallucinating. They didn't tell me anything when I had a crush on him , nothing when I told them that I wanted to confess, nothing when I started hanging out with him , but now that I'm deeply in love they call me selfish for not wanting to let him go .
My thoughts are all over the place . I always put my members before myself and they make me feel like I think about myself only .
Jisoo : People know about him and I anyways . we literally faked a whole relationship now that it's REAL i have to give up ? Because they don't need me to put myself in this position anymore ?
Jungkook : You know ... i think that you should rest . You didn't stop even a bit . I totally get what you're talking about but you don't know what you want . You're not happy . Look at you . You've been ignoring Taehyung because of everything. Just calm down take a break .
I sighed thinking about what I really wanted. I've been depressed since Jennie's death . I've been trying to hide a big secret from everybody but it's getting hard and exhausting.
Jungkook ; I love you Jisoo . Always count on me .
Jisoo : I love you too Jungkook . Thank you so much .
A tear falls on my face, i don't want drama around me , I don't want to be unhappy . I felt his arms around me . I put the dishes down and turned around to hug him back .
Jungkook stayed with me all day then left to be with someone. I just stayed in my bed the moment he left the house . I called Taehyung that night , he told me that he loved me and that he missed me .
Chaeyoung didn't sleep in our room , she went to her friend's. I was we frustrated about it but didn't say anything .
Lisa came in my bed in the middle of the night , I was crying before she came , she cried a lot too when she saw me.
I want everything to end .
_____
What kind of ending do you guys want ?
btw when i'm done with this story i'm going to write this again without changing anything . it's just so poorly written it pisses me off !!!
