When rainbows fall

Chapter 19. Poppy

I stare at my phone and frown, my eyes drifting over those words

Happy birthday

How can it be happy when Sarah is dead? I glance at the picture of Sarah and the kitten she got from the RSPCA. She looks happy.

I'm sorry. Why won't you forgive me?

She's not sorry. She never is.

I look at the photo of me and Cosette when we were fourteen and then at a photo with Sarah.

I block her number.

And in my usual fashion, I unblock her again.

~~~~~

I stare at the missing person poster taped harshly to the post. Miles smiling face stares back at me.

There was no warning. No reason. No understanding.

I rip it off the post. What's the point? No one can save Miles now.

Before, I could convince myself that what happened to Cosette was an accident. I could pretend that there was no way it could be murder- the police were just wrong.

But now?

Everything is going wrong.

People are dying and no one can deny that there's a murderer on the loose.

I could hide my emotions behind the fact that it wasn't my fault. Cosette always got dizzy and clumsy when she got too drunk. Everybody knew that. 

I had instantly felt bad enough about what I said to her. If I had more time I would have apologised.

Now, I'm going to hell.

It's a Saturday morning, and the streets are empty. There are no kids playing and no mother's chatting. 

The group chat, which I was forced to be in, has been blowing up. All acting like they all knew him and didn't exclude him for being gay.

Every time I leave someone adds me back, and if I'm in it I may as well get the drama. Because the stupid stuff they say sure is entertaining.

Especially when someone becomes tyrannical for absolutely no reason.

They all seem to also have an irrational hate of babies like some baby killed the love of their life or something.

None of them knew or Liked Cosette yet they act like she was their best friend. Post after post after post each one getting more likes than the one before.

And they call me cold.

I haven't seen or heard from Tommy in four days. Two months ago, I would have cared, but now ts different.

People, who never knew even he existed or acknowledged him, keep on asking about him. Like I would know? Just because we're talking doesn't make us friends.