𝑸𝒖𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒆 [𝒍𝒓𝒉]

𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 - 𝒃𝒓𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒏 𝒑𝒊𝒆𝒄𝒆𝒔

❝𝘉𝘙𝘖𝘒𝘌𝘕 𝘗𝘐𝘌𝘊𝘌𝘚❞

I couldn't hear anything after I observed his words. There was a loud whistletone trapped inside of my ears and my room started to spinn.

I sat there for a few minutes, not making a sound, staring onto my laptop before I refound my voice.

"No, you're not", I whispered, half crying while shaking my head in denial.

There was no chance that he was gay. He had been my boyfriend for over a year now. He was the boy who made me laugh most of the days only because he was there. I refused to believe with everything I could that he was attracted to men. It just couldn't be possible.

"Yes, I am", he insisted, but it didn't matter how may times he would tell me, my mind wouldn't understand. I didn't want to understand.

"But what about us?", I questioned, "didn't you feel at least something through the whole time we were together?"

Did this mean he had lied to me for all the time? Didn't he love me for at least a second? My heart felt ripped out of my chest, its left over space being refilled with a heavy cold stone. How could he do this to me?

I needed him.

"Of course I felt something. I love you, Jade. I want to be there for you whenever you need me but I can't be your boyfriend", he explained, his voice sounded muffled due to the the fact that he had his face buried in his hoodie to stop the tear flow.

"Then why did you decide to date me in the first place?", I began to run out of arguments. I couldn't believe that this was actually happening.

I had always been sure that Mason was the boy I'd end up being married to. There had to be something who could prevent this relationship from falling apart. I wasn't ready to let him go jet.

"Because I didn't know I was gay back then. Why should have I decided against it? You're a beautiful girl. I don't need to be straight to know that. And I like you a lot. How was I supposed to know that I only loved you as a friend?"

As a friend.

I couldn't believe that he friend-zoned me after one and a half year of relationship. Just like that, without any warnings.

We both remained silent for what seemed like ages.

"Please say something", Mason broke the silence.

"I don't know what to say, honestly", I admitted, looking at the keyboard of my notebook, not daring to see the pain my words would cause him.

"I'm still the same person, I just-"

I interrupted him: "No you're not. Do you have an idea how overwhelming this is for me? I lived the past one and a half year thinking that what we had was real love. I was convinced that we would be forever, Mason."