𝑸𝒖𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒆 [𝒍𝒓𝒉]

24 | Safety Pin

Lost in my thoughts, I didn't realize that the song had ended, and that Mason was talking to me. His voice was only a muffled sound that seemed to be far away.

I didn't even move, all I did was staring at the screen of my laptop, but not really looking at it. It was as if I stared into an empty room.

Too many thoughts were swirling around in my head and I wasn't sure to which of them I should listen to. But one of them was the strongest and drowned all the others out.

Listen to your heart.

And I knew exactly what my heart wanted.

It wanted to stand up, walk over into Calum's room, interrupting the two best friends playing on Cal's play station and kiss the tall blond passionately.

I knew that I couldn't do that if I wanted to come back alive of the room, but I could at least plan how I'd confront Luke. I somehow wanted to make it special, I wanted to surprise him with a sweet gesture, apologizing for my own stupidity and telling him that I wanted to give us a shot and that I was sorry for pushing him away the other day and that I'd do anything to make up for that.

I was well aware that it was risky, but maybe Luke was right, and Calum would understand. And in the end, if Luke was the one, he clearly was worth a fight with my brother. He had no right to tell me who I could like and who I couldn't.

"JADE", Mason yelled, snapping me out of my thoughts.

Not really knowing who or where I was, I shook my head. "What?"

"I've asked you like five times, how you liked the song", he explained.

"Oh... I'm sorry, I think I was away", I mumbled, "But I did hear it, and it's amazing."

I sent him a soft smile to show him that I truly meant the compliment and didn't only say it because I felt forced to.

"What's on your mind?", Mason asked, "or should I say: who is on your mind?"

I gave him a sceptical look.

"I know that face, you only make it when you think about someone who is important to you", he smiled widely. Once again, I was shocked on how well he knew me.

"It's Luke, isn't it?", his smile grew even bigger, even though I didn't think that it was possible.

My whole body flinched together by the sound of his name and I felt the blood heating up in my cheeks.

"How d-did you know?", I stuttered, being overwhelmed by the situation. He was gay, yes, but he was still my ex and talking to him about Luke just felt wrong, but at the same time I knew that he would listen and that he was the perfect person to talk about the little drama that was going on in my life.

"Oh come on Jade", he giggled, "'hE's AcTuAlLy AlRiGht' you should have seen the light in your eyes."

I dropped my jaw, not believing that he was actually making fun of me.

"I don't talk like this", I said upset, crossing my arms.

"Yes, you do", he continued to giggle. "So, tell me about it."

"I don't know how this all happened, but I messed up... big time", my voice thinned, and I lowered my gaze hopelessly.

"I need to know a bit more details to understand", he remembered me, not stopping to send me an encouraging smile into my direction.

I took a deep breath and started to tell him everything from the beginning, how Luke was the first person to whom I talked to about the problems I had, to the way he was there for me after he broke up with me and how I started to catch feelings, as I shared all those meaningful conversations with him while laying on the cold floor of the balcony, looking up into the stars and eventually drifting off to sleep in his arms.