"Alright, you edgy bitches, time to absolutely destroy those virges in the park." Y/N addressed her sidekicks, putting on her mask. One of her protégés, Kao, sighed as he clipped on his utility belt.
"Y/N, when are you gonna stop being a dumbfuck?"
"Hey!" Y/N protested, stepping out of the men's restroom with her two sidekicks, unknowingly attracting weird stares from people who were wondering what a grown woman was doing walking out of a men's restroom with two teenage boys. "You gotta address me as Rewind while we're out, and don't be such a meanie!"
Kao rolled his eyes, pinning a quickly approaching villain to a pole with leaves. "Whatever you say, boomer."
"Alright you fucking fetus," Y/N grumbled, narrowing her eyes at Kao as she punched a leaping villain in the nuts. "I may be older than you, but at least I know my times tables!"
"We're in highschool, Master, not kindergarten." Y/N's other sidekick, Koyama, interjected as he morphed into an octopus, wrapping his tentacles around another villain. Y/N quickly poured water onto him as she stepped on a villain's face, smushing him into the ground.
"Is there a difference?"
Y/N sighed as she mercilessly beat up the villain she pinned down, mind traveling.
'I must really bother Bakugo, huh? Not gonna lie, hearing what he said about me to Mineta kinda hurt. And to Mineta of all people? Double burned.'
Kao rolled his eyes once again, handing Y/N a pair of handcuffs. "Just arrest that guy, already."
"I was planning on it." She huffed, clipping the metal cuffs around the villain's wrists. "And...voila!"
Koyama morphed back into his regular human body, usual bored expression painting his face. A horde of reporters suddenly surrounded Y/N and her companions, cameras flashing in their faces.
"Rewind! What is your current relationship status?"
"Miss Rewind, Miss Rewind! Are you planning to collaborate with Red Heart for a clothing line?"
"Miss Rewind! Why did you step out of the men's restroom with two underage boys?"
"Listen, listen, listen folks. I got a good quote for you, so listen carefully." Y/N said seriously, grabbing a microphone. The reporters leaned in, eagerly waiting for the profound words the famous pro hero was going to say. She took a deep breath.
"Eat ass, smoke grass, and sled fast. That is all I will say."
The confused mumbles of the crowd were heard as Y/N and her protégés walked away, cackling and wheezing. Even in the face of a thousand reporters, Y/N was Y/N. Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.
***
"Yo, Y/N, you're a simp?" Kao said as he scrolled through Twitter, lazily sitting on the couch. Y/N's eyebrows raised as she walked over to Kao and Koyama, draping her arms over the back of the couch.
"I'm a what now?"
"You're a simp." Koyama piped up, holding up his phone to her face. Displayed on the screen was her Twitter, galore with retweets at Katsuki. One in particular was on the screen, of her replying to a tweet Katsuki made about hating the new Association rules.
"keep your head up, king, your crown is falling 😔✌️"
To which Katsuki replied with: "Shut the fuck up"
"I can assure you, I am not simping for that man. You've got the wrong bitch." Y/N said defensively, raising her hands up.
"You're hardcore simping."
"Am not."
"Are too."
"Am not."
"Are too."
"You smell like a lawnmower."
"Listen- are you retweeting Ground Zero while I'm talking to you?"
"...no."
YOU ARE READING
simp (katsuki bakugo x reader)
Fanfiction"how much longer do I have to put up with you?" y/n l/n is a pro hero with a goofy personality, although she is good at her job. what kind of antics will ground zero get into when paired with her for a mission?
