My Heart Belongs To You|The Jodeci Collection|Aaliyah & Devante Swing

Chapter 15:Lotus

I was at the hospital, sitting anxiously in the room. As soon as we wrapped on set, I was sitting in the waiting room, waiting to get a pregnancy test. I was nervous and excited at the same time. If I was pregnant, me and Devante's little family would be complete. We would be married in a huge house with two little kids running around.

I was just nervous because I'm in the middle of promotion. How is it gonna look with the fact that I'm in my first movie and I'm knocked up. I guess I made the decision that night when I said I wanted him to put a baby in me. To be totally honest, I was partially telling the truth in the moment. Sex heightens every emotion in that moment.

Yes, I decided that I wanted to have a baby. I thought in that moment that was the main priority, having a baby. I totally forgot that I still in a movie that I have to do promotion for. When I said I was gonna have his baby, I didn't really mean in that moment. I more so meant after the movie was out and everything was over.

But of course I was off birth control and he felt too good for him to pull out so that happened. Now I'm here, possibly pregnant. I was startled when the doctor barged in the room. "Well Miss Steven, it looks as if you are pregnant. Congratulations, you're two and a half months along"he said. I cried automatically.

His smile faded, "There is some is some sort of bad news though"he said. I got scared. "In your medical records, you said you've been on birth control since you were 13. Is that correct"he said. I nodded, "Okay and this was the pill, shot or implant"he said. "Implant"I said.

He sighed, "Miss Stevens, around the time you started birth control, it was still very new. Now that some test have been ran, we've found that birth control can be very dangerous to a woman's reproductive system. Specifically implants" he said. What was he trying to say, "Doc, what are you trying to say to me"I said. "Miss Stevens, I'm afraid that because of your prolonged use of implant birth control, your baby and yourself might be in grave danger"he said. I broke down and cried in my hands. Why does this have to happen to me.

"But the flip side of that is we won't exactly know if anything is going wrong unless we do an ultrasound"he said. I'm just hoping when they pull my baby up, there's nothing wrong. He told me to lay down and lift my shirt. I did as he told. He pulled out this jelly stuff, rubbing it on my stomach.

Why in the world does this stuff have to be so cold and why didn't the doctor warn me. A few minutes later, the baby was on the screen. It was little bean shape. I wiped my eyes as the doctor looked up at the screen. "Would you like to hear it's heartbeat"he said.

I nodded. He went a little lower, the baby's weak heartbeat showing playing in the room. "Okay, it is a very weak heartbeat"he said. I wish Devante was here to hold my hand and wipe my tears. I was just in here alone.

Eventually, he got what he needed and turned off the machine. He wiped off my stomach before I sat up. "Well Miss Stevens, the bad news is that we do see significant signs of defects which shouldn't show up this early in your pregnancy. The good news is that your baby does have a pretty strong heartbeat to say that there are defects. You should be very lucky because sometimes we don't pick up a heartbeat on the ultrasound"he said. I wiped my tears. "I suggest that until we figure out how to fix these defects that you don't announce your pregnancy. Not to the father, family or friends. This is temporary of course, only until we can find a solution"he said.

So not only do I have a sick baby inside of me, but I also have to keep the news of my sick baby away from everyone. "Well, you're all set to go. You can head to the desk and get your pictures if you would like and your prenatal vitamins"he said. I nodded. He put his hand on my shoulder, "I promise Miss Stevens, we'll make sure that both you and you baby come out of this happy and healthy"he said before leaving the room. To be honest, I doubt it.

I grabbed my purse and hopped down from the chair. I went to the desk and grabbed my vitamins and pictures before going back in the waiting room. Tiffany, Shanice, Ro and Lacey were all in the waiting room. Tiffany of course called them. Tiffany was the first to talk.

"What did the doctor say"she said. I listened to the doctor. "I'm not pregnant, it was just a stomach bug"I said. They all sighed, hugging me. "I'm sorry J, I know how much you and Devante wanted a baby"Shanice said.

"Thank you guys"I said. Eventually, Tiffany took me home. As soon as I got through the door, Calvin was running up to me, trying to show me a new picture he drew at school. "Mommy look, me and Tanya made it"he said, forcing the picture in my hand. I chuckled, kneeling down in front of him.

It was a simple coloring page that they both colored on. Of course it was outside of the line. "It's beautiful sweetheart"I said, trying to ignore the sudden urge to want to puke. Devante, came out of the kitchen. "Calvin, what did I tell you about bothering mommy as soon as she walked in the door. Let her settle a little bit"he said.

"Okay"Calvin said, dragging him and his picture back to the coffee table, continuing to color in his picture. "As a matter of fact, dinner is almost ready. Go upstairs and wash up"he said. Calvin jumped up and ran up the stairs. I chuckled as Devante walked up to me. He wrapped his arm around me, kissing me.

"How was your day"he said. I pushed back pregnancy and doctors visits. "Pretty good, we wrapped up early and went out to get something to eat"I said. "Dang, that sucks cause I was actually making your favorite tonight, gumbo"he said. "You mean, my gumbo recipe"I said.

"Yup and trust me, it taste just like it"he said. I was enjoying the fact the Devante was trying to learn how to cook and stuff but I was on the verge of throwing up on him right now. "You know what, it's been a long day and I have to take a shower. I'll see just how good it is when I get out"I said. He smiled, "Okay"he said before kissing my cheek. He pulled away and went into the kitchen.

I ran up the stairs and went to my bedroom. I closed the door behind me and automatically went to the toilet. I threw up, choking in the process. This was the worst. I got up and immediately brushed my teeth.

I walked out of the bathroom and kicked off my shoes, sitting on my bed. I felt like crap right now. I already felt like I had to throw up again and because of something I did, me and my baby are in danger. I've been since I was thirteen. My nanny had heard about all of these kids in Baltimore who were getting pregnant young and did not want that for me.

Birth Control was the new things and every girl's parents were jumping on the opportunity and my nanny was one of them. The implant was simple. You get it put in and you don't have to change it again for another three years. At the time it was cheap and it promised to work. I got it put in at 13 and since then I've had it.

I heard about the complications back in high school but I had never had any problems so I thought it didn't affect me. Now I realized it did and now it's gonna affect my baby. I grabbed my purse and pulled out the pictures and vitamins. I just wish I could tell Devante. If I did tell him, I wouldn't feel like I was in this by myself.

At least the father would be there to help me. I opened the bottles and took what I needed to take. I stashed them in my nightstand, hoping that Devante wouldn't see them. I did the same with the pictures before going in the bathroom and turning on the shower. This is not how I saw my pregnancy going.