"What do you think of this one, honey? It's very pretty and I think Sean's mother will love it." I leaned against the shopping cart with a bored look on my face, watching my mother chatting more to herself then to me.
"Mmm..." I hummed along. My eyes darted around the aisle, sliding from one boring plant vase to another. Three aisles diagonally from the aisle we were in, I could see the toy section. I shifted in my spot, stealing glances over to my mother every few seconds. She was still mumbling to herself.
When she had picked me up from school and said we were going shopping, I thought that meant that we would roam mindlessly through the store like we usually did, every now and then throwing in a couple of unhealthy and sugary items. I didn't expect her to mean this.
This is boring. I pouted, crossing my arms. I was still staring over at the toys section, spotting two other girls around my age of 8, playing with a small ball. I wanted to go over there, but I was shy and I didn't want to leave my mom behind. But quickly, after a few minutes, the girls left with their mother. I didn't hesitate and took my chance. My tiny feet lead me over to the section and I spotted something that immediately caught my eye.
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She was just like me, but she had a gold dress and a crown. I wanted to be her. I wanted to have her. I reached out with my small hands and grabbed the box she was contained in. My smile grew as I turned back to the aisle my mother was in, to show her.
"Mommy look..." But she was gone. Panic started to rise in my chest. "Mommy!" My breathing became faster and every thing around me felt unknown. I kept walking, but I was only making it worse. I didn't know where I was and I couldn't find my mother. "Mommy!" Tears streamed down my face as I stood there in the middle of the store, gripping the doll in my small hands.
"Move out of the way!" I felt a hard shove to my shoulder.
I gasped, coming back to reality, as I looked at the chaos around me. I had tears in my eyes again and I wiped them away, frustrated. Now wasn't the time for this. I gripped the shopping cart bar and forced myself from the spot I was rooted in. People moved past me, giving annoyed glares as they past. I let my head fall, letting my hair shield my burning face as I trudged forward.
I figured that memory came to me in the moment due to my anxiety of being left alone in such a busy environment, but I just had to let it go. Making my way into a less crowded aisle, I shoved on my gloves and started grabbing anything that I saw to be beneficial. After what seemed like twenty minutes, I noticed my cart was getting full and my items were seemly starting to add up, so I decided to start heading for the cashier.
Unknowingly, I was still holding my breath, even though I had a mask on, but I realized that the entire time that I was walking around, I wasn't scared or worried about catching the virus from someone near me, but more about if I was going to get out of the store alive without being trampled on and finding my way back to Jackson. Having the thought of Jackson, I craned my head, looking in every possible direction for him, but couldn't see him anywhere. There was too many people for me to distinguish him even if he was in the crowd.
