Peter didn't know when the idea popped into his head. Maybe it was back when he was still living with his mom, and he saw news coverage of other people jumping from the Golden Gate Bridge. Maybe it was after he joined the team, and he visited San Francisco on a run one day.
It could've been any time, honestly. All he knew was that if he was going to kill himself one day, he would go out peacefully. It wouldn't hurt, right? It would be like falling asleep, and he'd wake up somewhere else. He'd wake up after he died, whatever happened then. Maybe he'd be reincarnated and be born to a loving family with both parents, not a mutant. He could live a normal life, be popular and get good grades in school. He could be average.
All he wanted was to fit in, but it seems like he was born to stand out like a sore thumb. Even his outward appearance of silver hair made him different, and it was exactly what he didn't like. He didn't even know why he had gotten rid of the damn brown hair dye. He could've fixed his hair. All his problems would've been fixed if he had just fixed his stupid hair. He wouldn't have felt the self-hate he felt now. He would've felt happy.
Thinking back, he remembered Y/n saying that she liked his hair. He thought about all the times she'd been nice to him. He was so undeserving of her kindness.
He thought of earlier that night when she'd hugged him. Why had he brushed her off? He felt terrible. Y/n was being nice, and he was a total dick to her. This was why he wanted to die. He couldn't be nice and just accept a hug. He couldn't tell Y/n that he was actually sad. All he could do was tell her to leave.
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Wilson - Peter Maximoff
FanfictionPeter Maximoff has been with the X-Men for a while. So has Y/n. He has a huge crush on her, but he'd never be good enough for her. Hell, she probably doesn't even care about him. He's in a slump. He's depressed, lonely, and just wants someone to no...
