The Phantom's Carol (Phantom of the Opera)

Chapter 2 - Snow Angel

Erik's POV:

I slammed my hands down on the piano. I couldn't think. My music was gone. Completely gone. The insanity was getting worse by the day. Sometimes I wished I could just kill myself. But though I might be brave in a lot of other things I wasn't brave enough to kill myself. I growled and searched for my cape. I need to take a walk. If I stayed much longer I would tear the place apart. Ever since Christine left I hadn't thought straight. I hadn't ever thought straight but it had been good to hear her voice. I wanted to hear it. There was days when I thought I wouldn't survive without her. The only thing that had helped with the madness before her was the music and now I couldn't even compose. It wasn't easy to live without her.

“Erik, you never deserved her. You are a monster and you know it. You deserve this life. This is your just punishment for living this long.” I grabbed my cape and looked into one of the last remaining mirrors. I glared at what I saw before me. I turned away. I couldn't bear to look at the monster before me. I knew he was always there but looking at him made it worse. I growled again and stalked out of the opera house cellars. It was snowing and I quickly covered my face with the cowl. People gave me strange looks but I ignored them. At least out here I wasn't going to tear apart anything, I didn't think. I had become unsure what I would do. There was a time when I had control but since Christine had left that was gone. The insanity was there at all times and out of control.

The snow fell softly and I sighed. It was beautiful but when I looked toward the sky all I could see was Christine's face looking back at me. That was enough to kill me. But, damn my constitution, I was still alive. As I walked down the street and into a darker part of town I noticed something lying on the ground. It was girl. She looked to be about sixteen. I heard her whisper something about loving her father and that she was going to see him soon. I realized what she was about to do. The girl was committing suicide. For a moment I almost left but when I looked at her closer I realized part of the reason. Her face was beautiful but scarred. It had been burned. I couldn't only imagine what she had gone through. As I bend down she frowned and fell unconscious. I couldn't leave her here. She might have wanted to die but something in me wouldn't let that happen. I reached down and almost touched her cheek. The last time I had touched a person was two years ago when Christine had allowed me to kiss her forehead. My boney finger came in contact with her soft cheek and tears came to my eyes. It was wonderful to touch another human. The warmth was more than I could handle. Even though the girl was freezing to death she was still warmer than me. I withdrew my hand and scooped her up in my arm. I shuddered at the feeling of someone so close. It felt strangely good. She shifted slightly and snuggled deeper. I wished I was like other people and could provide her with warmth. I sighed and carried her back to my home.

Once I had slipped her into the bed and tucked her in. I wasn't about to take off her clothes. They weren't too wet anyway. Just a little damp. I lit the fire in the room and left. I couldn't stand the warmth and the painful memories. The last time someone had slept in that bed was when Christine had been there (AN: I don't know if that is in the book. I really need to re-read it. Please tell me if I am wrong I will re-write it. Thanks.). I walked over to my piano and started to play again. It struck me suddenly. My music was back.