broken promises ↦ jacob barber

emptiness

julia's thoughts kept her awake all night, every time she closed her eyes her thoughts would get the best of her. did jacob do it? is he lying? stuff like that. she looked over to see him sleeping peacefully besides her, it's actually kinda funny. anyone she slept over jakes house she'd always fall asleep fast because it was him. it was him holding her. her mind instantly went to the kiss they shared earlier in the day and her cheeks started heating up thinking about it. what if he just kissed me because he pity's me? she couldn't ask him, he already has too much on his plate and he didn't need the added stress of trying to figure out his feelings. but all her thoughts were eating her up alive. she practically jumped when she felt him groan, his eyes fluttering open. "what are you still doing up?" he lazily asked, barley opening his eyes. "i cant sleep." she admitted. "why not?" he asked, beginning to become fully awake. "just- i don't know. it's hard to explain.." she said. "you can tell me anything," he said. "i don't want it to offend you." she said. "what? what do you mean?" he asked. "it's just- did you kill ben? i know you said you didn't and i-i shouldn't even be asking you this, it's just, i don't know.." she said, feeling regretful she even asked him that. she could barely see his face but she could tell it was hurt. "how could you even ask me that?" he asked, beginning to remove his arms from around her, but she grabbed onto his arms in the process. "jake, i'm not saying i don't believe you. i do, one hundred percent. it's just- how did your fingerprint get on ben's shirt tag?" she asked. she brushed a few pieces of hair out of his eyes, hoping it'd give him some sort of comfort, which it did. he gave into her touch. "i just found him there. i didn't know if he was hurt or what, so i grabbed him by his collar and i saw the blood and freaked out. julia, i promise you, i didn't do it. i wouldn't lie to you." he said, not once breaking eye contact so she knew the sincerity behind his words. "okay." she said, feeling a bit more relieved. "now can you please go back to sleep, you have school tomorrow and i don't want you to be tired all day." he asked. she nodded her head and cuddled back up against him. he drew comforting circles on her back which sent her into a peaceful sleep.

the next day jacob had another appointment with joana, his attorney while julia spent the day in school barley paying attention as perusal. school wasn't the same without jacob, she didn't have someone to sit next to at lunch or in any of her classes so most of the time she sat alone. sure she had friends, but they weren't as close to her as jacob is. her and derek have been growing a bit closer, although she feels a bit guilty since he's jacobs other best friend and she didn't want him to feel like he was being replaced or anything so she just hasn't told him about it. claire told her it was best if she stood home for the night, so that's what she did. she's been facetiming jacob all night, ever since she got home from school. "schools just not the same without you.." julia said. "i know, im sorry i can't be there. my parents just said it's better for me to have a tutor because the way kids talk, you know." jacob said. she did know, all she's been hearing are rumors about jacob going around school, some people even had the nerve to ask her if he did it and she was just hiding it from her classmates. "yeah, trust me i know." she said. "so uh, derek told me you guys have been getting close." jacob said. "oh uh- yeah, i guess you could say that." she said. "why didn't you tell me?" he asked, out of genuine curiosity. "i don't know." she sighed. "do you like him?" jacob asked, raising an eyebrow at her. "what?! no- no ew. i do like someone, but definitely not derek." she said. jacob had a smirk plastered onto his face. "oh yeah? and who might that be?" he teased, knowing it was him. "no one you know. anyways, changing this awkward subject, do you like anyone?" she asked, flipping the role. "yes, i do actually." he said. "oh yeah, and who might that be?" she teasingly mocked. "you." he said.