Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before (Girlxgirl)

Chapter # 24

I couldn't believe it. I was going to finally do what I had been so afraid to do for so long. I guess everything was sort of put into prospective for me when my mom dropped the bomb.

What did I care if my boyfriend--of whom I couldn't really truly be with--hated me afterwards? It was my life and I was going to act like it was.

I couldn't let a man control my life just for the sake of staying friends. So, I called him after school. I hadn't actually gone to school. I figured what was one more sick day, huh? I needed it more than I needed to go to school.

I was waiting sort of impatiently for him to arrive at my house. My brother had left for a few hours to give us some much needed privacy after scolding me for double timing.

I had ignored most of what he said. His speech was full of what ifs and crushed feelings and I aready had my fair share of crushed feelings and I wasn't really looking out for someone else's.

When the door bell rang, I went to answer it. On the front porch steps, looking small and lost was the boy I had called my boyfriend for the past year and a half now. I honestly couldn't wait to be free of all of the guilt I was carrying around.

I wasn't meant to be the bad guy. I was meant to be a good person, it just got buried in the selfishness and the lies that I told myself to keep myself sated. But I wouldn't lie anymore because I had a girlfriend who loved me and came out to her mom for me and I was going to be completely honest in my corner as well.

I was finally ready to slip on my big girl panties and deal with whatever was coming. "Hey, come in." I told him, holding the door open, ignoring with a twist of guilt when he reached in for a hug. I tried to ignore the frown on his lips and the look of hurt.

I had to be strong for the both of us.

I led him into the kitchen and he sat while I stood. It seemed to fit like that. I was in a pacing, talk with my hands kind of mood and I know it was the nerves but it made this a little better.

"Jason...I haven't been honest with you. I haven't been fair and I haven't been a good girlfriend to you, and I think that we both know that." He didn't butt in like he usually did. It was coming to a close and he felt that. So did I.

"I'm not the girlfriend you want me to be simply because I cannot be the girlfriend you want me to be. I've been hiding all this time and I realize that there are bigger issues in this world than my high school boyfriend hating me because I'm gay."

There was a shocked intake of breath from him, but I wasn't done. I felt free and I was going to say what I wanted to say, dammit.

"I'm gay and my girlfriend, the one that I met with no intention of dating, is perfect to me and she made me sort of realize that secrets don't really make anybody happy. They don't. I wasn't happy and you weren't happy and I think that now that this is out in the open we can both see that it's for the best."

He was crying now. he had his face in his hands and his shoulders were shaking with his sobs. I felt a bit responsible for it, but I shook off that feeling.

"How could you do that to me, Taylor? I gave it all to you, I gave you everything I had and you wasted my time." I nodded and walked over to him. "I know, Jason. I'm not saying it was right of me, but it wasn't wrong of me either. I had to figure myself out. I had to find who I was, and I'm sorry that you were the collateral in all of this, but you didn't--don't--mean nothing to me and I still care, I'm still the same girl, I'm just gay. That's all. That's it. I'm not going to grow a second head and I don't spit fire. You can remember me as that bitch ex-girlfriend and you can hate me and blame me but I had to do what I had to do to grow up. I'm so sorry."

He looked up at me and shuddered violently. "O-okay. I'm not going to hate you, Tay. I'm just u-upset." I nodded and patted his shoulder to comfort him. "That's alright. You can be upset all you want to. That's fine. But no one was more upest than me when I found out."

He laughed. It was strangled and estranged but he laughed and suddenly he was hugging me. "Who's the lucky girl?" He asked me.

I hesitated.

"You aren't going to send a lynch mob after her, are you?" he pulled away and gave me a strange look. "No, Tay. I just want to know the girl that stole you away from me. Her and her gay ways. Maybe I could get some tips." I laughed then.

"You know Talia McKenzie?" He nodded. "That's her. My...my girlfriend." he chuckled to himself. "At least she's hot, I guess. Wouldn't want you to downgrade."

That's how I knew that we would be fine. He wasn't that upset about it. It was some stupid high school relationship and it was mostly one sided. Guess I wasn't the only one who grew tired of it.

We would be fine. I would be fine.

∆∆∆

This might be short but I like it. Taylor is finally sticking it to the man!

I totally just bombed my first exam. Well, I think I did. I wrote down my answers and then counted up the points I SHOULD get if I know the answers and the sat there and docked points off because I know I didn't answer the questions correctly...??? Idk, but I figure I'll get a C- because if its 85 points and I bullshit two short answers that's like two points each and then I bullshit another one (an essay one) I'll lose 5 points plus 5 more points because I have too much pride. Yep. That's a C-. Ugh.

Well that's know I do math! And tests! Anyway, thanks for the votes and reads and comments, It fills my heart with love!! ♥♥♥