Of Light And Shadows

Chapter Thirty Two...

Jia was in the old dormitories. The corridor was dark save for the light filtering beneath Evander's door. She had no key to his room and she was alone, but she knew he could hear her. She sat with her back against the wood, knees drawn up to her chest and a headache throbbing at her temples.

Belphegor's warning rattled around in her head like the tolling of a church bell, rolling over endlessly in her mind. It made sense really. Of course Satan would see her as a threat. Lucifer had already said he planned to defy his father to protect her. If he were in love with her it would only make him fight harder to keep her close to him.

And of course there was the matter of Satan wanting her for his collection. If she chose Lucifer he'd see it as a loss, and she didn't think he was a man that liked losing very much. The memory of his thumb stroking her cheek, still wet with his son's blood, made her shiver.

"Ev?" She spoke softly, listening to the sounds inside the room. Every so often she heard the rustle of a page turning as he devoured another book, though no other noise came through the barrier between them.

"Can you hear me?" Another long silence stretched out before her, and then the bed springs creaked and a moment later a shadow fell across the light streaming under the door. She heard something slide against the wood and she knew he was sat right behind her.

"I'm here," he said.

"They made your chain longer."

"I'm not wearing a chain anymore." He hesitated. "Your friend got Sellik to take it off me."

"That's good."

"The only heartbeat I hear is yours. Why isn't he with you?"

"He doesn't know I'm here," Jia replied. "You put him back in the Infirmary and now Sellik has him on bed rest."

"I put the Demon Prince in the Infirmary?" He sounded incredulous. She was relieved when there was no satisfaction in his tone.

"You punched him in the chest after he'd been stabbed," she answered. "Of course you hurt him."

"How's your arm?" She heard the crushing guilt in his words and glanced down at her fully healed limb, remembering the anger in his eyes as he'd squeezed hard enough to crush it.

"It's fine. I had a brace on for a few days but it's gone now."

"I'm so sorry." A harsh exhalation of breath followed. "I'm ashamed of myself. Can you ever forgive me?"

"I've already forgiven you," she answered. "I know you didn't mean it."

"You're too good to me." He sounded like he meant it. "I wanted to throw myself off a bridge after you left. I hate myself for it and you should hate me too."

"No. You've become something entirely new, Evan. I knew there'd be some teething problems and I chose to deal with it. Your temper was just a part of those problems and my arm was collateral damage."

"I don't know why Lucifer rubs me up the wrong way," he said softly. "He barely even has to speak. I know he wasn't doing anything to goad me and I still wanted to annoy him. I wanted him to get angry so that I had an excuse to be angry too. I know I can't keep a lid on it and yet I want an argument anyway." He sighed again. "I get...jealous." Jia could practically see him squirming uncomfortably at the admission.

"Jealous?" she frowned.

"Yeah."

"What is there to be jealous of?"

"He gets to be around you without fear of hurting you. He's comfortable with you." Evan's answer was quiet and Jia's head started to pound harder, blurring her vision at the edges. "He acts like he's known you all your life. Even when you're not there and I ask about you he has that stupid fond look on his face." He paused again. "I thought I was the only one entitled to that. I'm meant to be your best friend and seeing that look on someone else makes me want to smash something. I should be happy that somebody else cares about you. I don't know why I hate it so much."