Find Our Way Back - T.H

•7•

After explaining to Lia what happened last night between Tom and Audrey, she agreed to let Audrey stay the night with her so I can have some thinking time.
"Thank you for taking her." I say to Lia.
"Yeah, take some time, chill out." she says.
"So she gets out of ballet at 6, then she needs to eat."
"I've got this just sit down, have some wine, and chill out." she says.
"I'm ready aunt Lia!" Audrey calls.
"You have everything?" I ask her.
"Yes! I can't wait to stay the night at aunt Lia's!" She exclaims.
"Love you sweetie, I'll see you tomorrow" I say, hugging her.
They walk out and I follow my sisters instructions, grabbing the wine and a glass.
I pour myself a glass, turning on the tv, and watching some Netflix.
I desperately need to not think about this situation for at least ten minuets but not even the good old humor of friends was able to direct my thoughts elsewhere. It's like being on a merry go round and not being able to get off. I'm spiraling into a panic all brought on by my own decisions and lies. If I would just own up to what I did and tell the truth, maybe this all would stop. Maybe everything would be okay.
If I let myself think about it for a while, it'll stop. I pause my show and walk to my closet, grabbing the box out, the box that held all my secrets. I go through her ultra sound photos, and find that one old crumpled up envelope, with the dark black letters writing Tom.
I read over the letter for the millionth time. Me confessing, that Tom had a child, that he is a father.
My phone vibrates and I grab it.
Tom: I saw Audrey leave with Lia, you alright?
And here he is, being the most genuine person and I'm fucking lying to him.
I feel anger towards myself. How could I let myself turn out like this?
Allison: I'm alright. Just having a drink.
I stuff all of the stuff back in the box, walking back out to the living room.
Soon, there's a knock on the door and I groan, knowing exactly who it is. And I don't want to see him right now. I'm not in the mindset for this.
I walk over, opening the door.
"Oh.. hey." I say, surprised to see Abbi.
"Lia said you were stressed and so I brought much stronger stuff." she says, holding up a bottle of alcohol.
"Come on in." I say, relieved it's just her.
We have a few drinks and talk about the situation. It feels good to be able to talk to someone outside of the situation. She listened intently, and I quite enjoy having her here right now.
"I just think you should tell him." she shrugs.
"Why?" I ask.
"Allie it's Tom. Tom Holland. The boy that's been obsessed with you since third grade." she says.
"He's different now Abbi." I sigh.
"No, he's really not. You haven't even been here. Yeah he's got different priorities now but he's still the same person he's always been." she says.
"Exactly! He has different priorities now. And I don't want Audrey to think she's second to a movie." I explain.
"Well right now she's feeling pretty bad about herself just from not having anyone around." She says. "And you really think Tom will prioritize a movie over his child? Yeah he'll have to leave now and then, but he'd always come back."
"You know what's awful? I can already see the connection, they love each other.." I say.
"And you want to throw that away?" She asks.
"No of course not." I shake my head.
"Then tell him."
It's not as easy as everyone thinks.. I have to worry about the possibility that he will want custody, that he'll want to do a split household. My daughter will not be put through that.

__next morning__
I wake up, feeling a nasty hangover. Thank god Lia has Audrey, shes a morning person, and I'm not. Especially when I have a hangover.
I pop some Advil, and take a hot shower while I wait for the pill to take effect.
"God why did we drink so much?" Abbi groans as she walks into the bathroom.
"You drank way more than me." I laugh.
"I'm gonna go home and go to bed again." She says.
I turn around, screaming when I see her head popped into the shower.
"What the fuck!" I laugh.
"You still got it." She nods approvingly before pulling her head out.
"You're so fucking annoying!" I call as I hear her walk down the hallway.
"You love me!" She yells.
I hear the front door shut and I finish up my shower. I turn off the water, grabbing my towel and wrapping it around me. The doorbell rings and I groan, Abbi always leaves her shit everywhere.
"It's open!" I call loudly, pulling my brush from the drawer.
"Hey it's me!"
I peek my head out, seeing Haz walking inside.
"Oh hold on, gotta throw some clothes on." I say.
"Ooo naked Allison?" He says jokingly and I roll my eyes.
"You're annoying." I say as I slip on my shorts and shirt.
"Audrey isn't home?" He asks.
"Nope, stayed with Lia so Abbi and I drank a bit too much." I laugh, walking out to the living room to see he's sitting on the couch.
"I figured that's what happened." He laughs.
"What do you mean?" I ask.
He laughs again, pulling out his phone and unlocking it. He hands it to me and I look at what's up on the screen, my hand flying over my mouth.
"Oh my god.." I say.
It's texts I sent last night to Haz, saying I want to fuck Tom..
"I didn't show him, but I'm sure he would have been down." He says and I face palm.
"This is so embarrassing please delete these." I say, handing him his phone back.
"No problem." He says, deleting the texts. "I just wanted to come by and see if you needed to talk."
"Talk?" I question.
"Yeah.. obviously there's some old feelings being stirred up.."
yeah. Except those feelings are mixed with guilt and anxiety. Tom and I are over each other, but we were together for so long.. we were each others first love. We will always have some sort of feelings for each other.
"It's nothing, I just wasn't expecting to see him again." I shrug, sitting down next to my best friend.
"Well, he wasn't expecting to see you either.." he says.
"Has he said anything?" I ask.
"Said that he misses you." He answers. "A lot."
"I miss him too.."

A/N: just a filler chapter, drama is comingggg