The Path to the Tower

10.2: The Broken Assassin

Over the next few months, Steve and Sam went from slowly and tentatively, feeling out a new relationship with these terms that didn't fit convention, to living together. Sam still saw Wanda and Natasha but Steve was surprised by how it didn't bother him. Back when he dated Bucky and Bucky kept looking for more, it had often made him feel like he wasn't enough. That there was some itch Bucky had that Steve would never be able to scratch. With Sam, it wasn't like that at all. With Sam he knew that he was enough, it's just that Sam had the capacity to love infinitely.

Steve understood it because he'd been feeling it too. Back before the war, Steve had been starved of love and affection. His mom had loved him and Bucky had loved him and that was it. It wasn't until he'd joined the army that he'd experienced what it was like to be loved and love two people at once. Now, he'd gathered this - family - around him and he loved them. Even though it was only Sam he was exploring the sexual part of it with, he did love all of them. So if Sam felt that way and wanted to have a physical aspect to that love, that was fine too. Maybe one day Steve might do that too.

For now, he was happy just having that with Sam. He loved waking up next to him in the morning on the nights he'd slept over. He loved the amount of touching and kissing they did when they made breakfast together. He loved the way Sam could read when he was uncomfortable. That he knew when to stop if he was, but more so he knew when to push him just outside them so he could grow. He loved the way Sam smiled and teased his slightly awkward attempts at romance. He loved the way he accepted his love.

Steve Rogers loved Sam Wilson.

If he had to share him, it was worth it.

Sam being there in the tower, working with him, being there when he got home, it was changing Steve. He could feel it. With Sharon, he had worried about her when her work gave her a dangerous mission, but the fact they spent months apart at a time meant the urgency wasn't there. When he went away on a mission he never felt the need to be careful or hurry back. He was just returning to an empty apartment anyway, so what was the point rushing? Now he had to worry. If Steve was reckless Sam chewed him out. If he was late and didn't call, Sam snarked at him. It made Steve realize that it was not just about him anymore, that there were people who did actually care if he didn't come home. Not only that but he wanted to come home to Sam. He wanted to not be the cause of his stress or worry.

The search for Bucky had been narrowing in. They knew he was in Romania. Initially, they thought he had been living rurally. There had been confirmed sightings in Bucharest but they were sparse and broken up by rumors of a man with a metal prosthetic working on farms in the surrounds and slightly further out. The belief was he was living transient and coming into the city only if he really needed to. Lately, the confirmed sightings were getting more and more regular in the city. It was like he had finally felt comfortable enough to create something at least semi-permanent and now the locals had started to notice him. They just needed to narrow down the location.

"You're gonna have to tell Tony, you know?" Sam said as he moved some files around.

"Tell Tony what?" Steve asked. He asked even though he knew the answer. He'd been avoiding it. He didn't want to hurt Tony. He didn't want to be the one that told him his parents hadn't died in a car accident. He didn't want to be the one that told him it was his Bucky that did it. Part of him thought it was better if Tony never knew. Right now they'd died in a terrible accident, but that was it. An accident. There was so much betrayal in Tony's past, maybe he didn't need to know about this one.

"You know, man," Sam said without looking up. "If you think Barnes has a shot of being released into our custody after all the dust settles, you gotta come clean with him now."