You ended up being kicked out of his house. He stuck to his words no matter how much you tried to lure him. Maybe he really did lose feelings for you. But at this point you didn't give a shit, you just wanted pleasure. He tried to talk to you, trying to ease your pain with words but you didn't want that. Your mood was already ruined that you came here for nothing and embarrassed yourself in front of Kai who you had to face at work today.
It was near dawn when you were lazily walking around the street going back to your place.
---
You quietly opened your front door that was luckily unlocked. You closed the door behind you only to be greeted by one person you barely wanted to see at the moment.
"where were you?" you glared at him not bothering to answer his question as he grabbed your arm and yanked you back so you could face him.
"I asked you a fucking question y/n, where have you been all this time"
It was still really early so luckily everyone was still asleep and the street of the neighborhood was silent
"I don't find it important to tell you where I had been all this time, so move!"
You pushed him out of your way and tried going upstairs but sadly were caught by your arm once again with much force. He held it tight but enough to not make you wince in pain.
"I will not let you leave until you tell me what your problem is. Why have you been behaving this way, what has gotten into you and your fucked up attitude that literally puts me in a terrible mood. Y/n I never asked for any of this. So, it's better if we just clear up the misunderstanding right now before it gets out of our hands"
"you don't get it do you Jimin?" you were facing him now clearing the distance between you two
"the problem is you and there is no fucking misunderstanding that we need to clear up. I hate you and I can't help but want to push you out of my life because all you have ever brought me is pain and discomfort. Since you came back from that fucked up idol life my life has been a mess. I can't think straight and everything is falling apart right in front of my eyes. I don't need you in my life anymore so fuck off" you clenched your jaw as you let out the words calmly but rather harshly
You made sure every word rolling out of your tongue was coated with hatred. That was the only way to push him away, to make him hate you. This was not what you meant. None of this was true and you hated the way you portrayed it. You could see the hurt in his eyes but he tried to cover it up. For an instance he felt as if his heart was stabbed with a knife but knowing how messed up your mind has been, he wanted to convince himself that none of what you just said was true. You don't mean any of it.
On the other hand, you hated how you couldn't think straight. It would've been so much easier to tell him about your feelings and be honest about it. Just hiding and covering it up was becoming a big mess and the only way to get rid of this was to make him hate you like you're gonna convince yourself to hate him.
"you don't mean that" he said lightly. The grip loosening on your arms and you felt his arms trembling a bit.
"I do" you stated leaving him standing there.
"y/n-" He turned to hold you again but you slapped his hand away
"stay away from me Jimin...leave me alone" the last words even made your heart clench. Hell, everything you said was breaking you from the inside conflicting a war that you never know when might end. Jimin saw your red eyes and tears that were threatening to fall; fell down one by one making his heart ache.
He finally let you go as you ran to your room and ended up bawling till your eyes started to hurt and were completely exhausted. You didn't even want to go to work today knowing that you had to face Kai but you also didn't want to face Jimin after whatever happened this morning.
'what did I do to deserve all of this' another tear fell on the side of your face as you lazily got up from the bed and sniffed your stuffy nose wiping away your dried tears. Being rejected hurts but not being honest to yourself hurts more (a/n: you know what hurts more? saving a chocolate for yourself only for your siblings to eat it behind your back that shit's painful)
Your head felt heavy and you wished for the ground to swallow you at the moment but pushing aside all your thoughts and fears you got up to take a shower and get ready for work.
'I'm okay'
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Guys are you tired of reading this? I feel as if this story is going a little too elaborated than I expected😅. I wanted to post more but i'll probably post it in parts. anyways the next chapter might give you a bit of hint of what's going on. Please leave a comment and vote, that really helps me a lot
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UNCONTROLLABLE DESIRE (Jimin X Reader AU)
Fanfictionhighest ranking #2 in teenage angst (in August) "what's your greatest desire?" "you" There are things you both are hiding but how long will you keep this up (Jimin x Reader)
