Mask of Celibacy

Chapter 30

On Sunday Helen stepped back and let Eric take the reins. After trying out the gym at Hart Recreation Center, he showed me around Dinand Library. Somehow I'd lost all sense of time. Whole hours seemed to evaporate right before my eyes.

Especially near him.

"I'd better head back to Helen's room," I said with a reluctant sigh. "She'll kill me if I turn up to our dancing lesson looking like a sack of potatoes."

"You don't have to let Helen dress you up unless you want to," Eric whispered behind me as I browsed the French section. "I like you just the way you are."

"That's kind of you to say, but she pointed out my decided lack of style."

"Jess?"

I turned to face him, suddenly all too aware of our proximity. Neither of us backed away. We simply stood there, lost in one another's gaze as his eyes searched mine.

Eric brushed a bit of my dark waves from my shoulder. Just like in my daydream before bed, only without the kiss. Goosebumps rose on my skin--the good kind. 

"If I hadn't changed, would you still be here with me?" he asked.

"Of course I would," I said. "Helen still has a photo of you. The old you. And I kind of had a bit of wistful nostalgia. I'd like you just the same. Who cares about fashion?"

"Well, there you go," Eric said in that rich, deep voice. "Neither do I. Some of us play the fashion game, but I do so out of necessity."

"Is it weird that I kind of miss you in glasses?"

"If you got rid of yours, I'd be very sad," he said, curling his lip. "So no weirder than me, I guess."

"Well, I do have a dress with me, but it's very chaste." I grimaced. "Floral. Ankle-length."

"How about this?" he said. "I'll put on my old graduation outfit, and you can wear your chaste little dress, and we can pretend it's my senior prom. The one I never attended in all its awkward glory."

"Oh my gosh!" I exclaimed in a muted whisper. "Really?"

"Yes," he said with a chuckle. "Really. I'll even wear my nerdy glasses."

I couldn't suppress a squee of delight, earning some dirty looks from nearby students. "Okay, let's do this. Oh, my gosh! Are we crazy or what?"

"Who cares what the others think?" he said, his eyes twinkling. "Let's just be ourselves for once."

"I don't even know what that means," I said with a wistful twinge in my heart.

"Then let's figure it out together."

***

Helen gave me a disdainful look later that evening, glaring at my empire-waist dress with short cap sleeves. "You're hiding your gorgeous figure. At least wear a cute belt or something."

"That wasn't the agreement," I said.

"But I've got the cutest little black velvet stretch cocktail dress that would look so good on you."

"That's not the point, Helen."

"Ugh, it is the point. You want him to pant like a hound when he sees you."

"Another time, gladly," I insisted. "But I made a pact with him. He'll wear his graduation suit--"

"Oh, God! If I see that corduroy monstrosity one more time, I swear I'll burn it," she growled. "For real, now. This date is going to be a disaster. Have you seen it?!"