Ruin Maketh Me

81 - I fucked up again

      When I come to, I'm in a familiarly heavy darkness, and I don't know whether to cry or to laugh. This is not the right time! Not at all! For God's sake, I was just in a car crash... Though, I clench and unclench my fingers, I guess, at least I'm still alive? Running my fingers through my hair, I slosh my way forwards through the black waters again. Somewhere towards the right, then straight ahead, then somewhat towards the left, there!
     The dark bleeds surreally away, and within arms reach, is the lone and bloodied figure of Ralph. My jaw tightens, but I don't avert my eyes from the cuts and bruises. These wounds, a part of them are my fault too. My stomach flips, and I lift a hand. Who'd think that by bringing him the slightest bit of hope, he'd suffer this isolation and pain a thousand lifetimes more?
      My fingers brush against his feverish skin, and a large hand immediately crushes my wrist. My body flinches involuntary backwards, but his fingers tighten harder and harder against my flesh until red hot pain pulses up my arm. His brilliant white hair slides over his broad chest, and in the dim light, his violet eyes lift and blink into existence.
      A jolt runs through my heart. This... I swallow, feet trembling to back away. I've made a mistake haven't I? How did it escalate into this? Yesterday, when I saw him, he was in pain but coping. And now— Ralph drags my body into him like a rag doll, boiling eyes seething with blinding rage that rises and crashes ruthless within the darkening purple. His gleaming fangs lengthen and sharpen, and the edge of his claws gripping my hands ignite another burning pain across my skin.
     "Ralph, I truly didn't mean to go," I whisper, "I couldn't help it."
     A growl tears from his throat, but accompanying the irrepressible explosion of animal brutality is the undeniable cruelty of intelligent thought. A wicked smile twists his sensual lips until all that's left within the distorted composition of his features is a violent desire. Coldness grips my shoulders, and my limbs stiffen. No— Flashing blue eyes, fingers clenched so hard they burn bloodlessly, "did you really think I wouldn't get angry at you?", shifting platinum hair, merciless smile—
     "You have to stay here with me." He bites into my ear, fangs rasping dangerously over my neck and earlobe, "You're not allowed to leave!"
     Air fills my lungs in short gasps, and I try to calm myself down, but my body refuses to listen to me. The sound of rushing blood pounds into my ears, and a dizziness crashes through my head, "Ralph liste—
     "NO." A calloused palm clutches my jaw, crazed eyes filling my sight completely. "You keep lying to me. Lying and lying and lying. I believed you, I listened to your every word! But I won't let you lie again." He murmurs, "I won't let you leave, ever. We'll be happy together hmm?"
     His eyes bends, and the broken smile deepens. My head shakes, once, twice. All wrong. This has gone all wrong. And it's my fault.
     "It's all your fault," He whispers beguilingly, "you made me like this, so you have to take responsibility."
     The hinges of my limbs soften, and I sag downwards, but the chains lengthen, and Ralph catches me in his hold.
     "If you lie to me again," He says, sliding a claw down my trouser legs, "I'll have to cut off your legs."
     Pain twinges across his face, but he doesn't let go of my legs.
     I swallow, take a deep shuddering gasp, "I won't lie to you anymore Ralph, I promise."
     This time, it's he who shakes his head, shining hair spilling over his shoulders, "I don't want to hurt you, but if you try to leave, I'll have to." A pause cuts his creamy voice, "I don't want to be left alone again."
     My hand lifts to his face, "I know, I know Ralph."
     "No," He breaths, "You don't.  You don't know anything at all." His gaze sharpens, and he leans down against me, "We're going to be happy together. I don't need anything else, I just need you, don't ever think of escaping."
      Trembling takes hold of my heart, and the bitter tang of iron spreads through my mouth. What can I do? How do I solve this? I don't know! It's not even that I want to leave, but how do I explain this whole dream, shadow situation to him?
      Ralph grasps my jaw and pulls me forward, simmering eyes searching my face, "You still want to leave don't you?" An air of murder suffuses from his powerful body, and his large hand pushes into my abdomen, "If I impregnate you, you won't leave me anymore will you? You wouldn't be so cruel to our child."
     My face freezes. Huh? Wait...what?
     But his unholy smile just stretches larger, and a deadly conviction calms the fuming seas within his dangerous gaze, "Yes, we'll be happy all together. You, me, and...our child."
     With these chilling words, he pushes me down and rips away all my imaginary clothes as if they're nothing but pieces of paper.
     "Wait, Ralph!"
     But he doesn't seem to listen, and his long tongue travels down my collarbone to my nipples. A rush of heat bursts up my torso.
"He'd live entirely off your affection, and if, if for even one second, you reject him, he'd lose his mind completely."
A sigh penetrates my lips, and I soften my limbs, "If that's what you want, Ralph."
His beautiful eyes shift upwards to me, and his hands loosen their shackling grip on my arms gently. His fingers travel down the side of my body, down the outline of my chest and the dip of my waist and the jut of my hips, and he envelops a nipple in his hot, wet mouth. My back arches upwards involuntarily, and he smiles, lips still squeezing the bud tightly.
     My fingers travel through the silky strands of his hair, and with a deep grunt, he slides upwards, taking my lips in his. Our saliva mingle, tongues crashing together in a waltz only the two of us understand.
"You're so beautiful." He whispers, licking my lips with his red tongue.
A whirling wind blows away all coherent thought, and my hands seek out his firm ass.
His dark pupils tighten into slits, grabbing hold one of my hands, he presses it to the erect firmness kissing his belly button, "Concentrate. On. Here." He moves my fingers down his impressive length bulging with throbbing veins, "This, is going to enter you here." He pokes my entrance with his index finger.
A shiver travels up the molten heat of my shaft, and I tease the head of his cock, sweeping the pad of my thumb softly over his slit. His eyes flutter close, and a low moan leaks from his glistening lips. Small translucent drops of pre-cum dribble from the top of his shaft and sweeping these away with my fingers, I push an index finger through my tight entrance.
Ralph's eyes widen, and he stares, gaze darkening into a smouldering chaos, at my finger travelling in and out of my hole.Without warning, he pushes my hand away, and sliding back down, replaces the finger with something hot and wet. My feet spasm, and my mind turns to mush at the sight of his handsome face between my legs.
"Ahhhn!" A moan escapes deeply from my throat.
At my cry, his tongue thrusts quicker and deeper into that indescribable place.
"Fuck, Ralph stop, mhhhhnnn, stop!" My hand pushes his head backwards.
His tongue slips out of me with an audible sucking noise, and he rises, licking his lips again as if he just tasted the sweetest nectar in this world.
"You're so fucking delicious." And with a thrust of his sculpted hips, he pushes his thick cock into me.
"AH!"
Pain and an ache for MORE spins through my back, up, up through every cell of my body, and all I can do is hold on for dear life as the burning fullness of his rod rocks deeper and deeper into me.
"Slo—slow down, too much!" I stutter, voice thin and breathless.
A growl tears through the space, and grabbing my hips, he pounds harder and harder into me until there's nothing but the mounting sweetness radiating through my root.
"Ah, aaah, ahhhn! I'm going to cum, I'm going to cum!"
He buries his nose into my neck, and with another long, deep stoke, the pleasure erupts, and I'm free falling down, down down, down...
"AH!" I gasp.
Ralph's balls slap against me, again, again, and again, brows furrowed, honeyed skin flushed red, and all the mind numbing pleasure burns into pain shooting through my shaft.
"Ral—ralph, I just came! Ahh, no, ahhh, slow, slow down!"
A deep grunt vibrates across my skin, "You want me to slow down, hmm?" He murmurs viciously, "Then, do it yourself!"
Cupping my butt with his rough hands, he flips me on top of him so that he's lying under me, glorious long hair pooling around his lust fumed face in the dark waters. A tingle spreads hot and furious through my abdomen.
He presses a hand to my erection, "Come on, move."
My throat dries, and I bite on my lip, but the re-ignited ache deep inside me begs me to do as he says.
Grabbing hold of his hard hips, I push against the ground. The molten length buried inside of me slides out, and before it escapes entirely, I lower myself down gingerly. His hard cock hits much deeper within, and unbidden tears well up within my eyes.
"Mmhhhn, mhhhn, mmmnnn."
I sit up and down slowly on his entire length, pure pleasure coursing through my body every time his instrument grazes that sweet spot.
"Hnnnng."
His closed eyes snap open, and his jaw tightens, angry red colour spreading from his cheeks to below his eyes.
"Fuck." He curses, and wrapping his fingers around my waist, he pushes me down his cock quick and sudden.
"Ahhhhhggg!" A raging current courses up my core, and I throw my head up, everything blurring into a haze.
Up, down, up, down, he yanks me onto him, tip of his rod hitting against that vulnerable spot every time.
"Noooo, ahhhhnnngg."
A wave full of destruction threatens to engulf me. I'll be unravelled! But before I can h0ld onto anything, it howls and crashes, and everything burns brightly white.
It's brilliant, it's mesmerising, it's everything; time and sensation merges and blurs, and when the light finally fades falteringly with the ringing in my ears, I'm back on the ground again, Ralph above me.
"Ahn, mhhn," Fractured moans sound from my mouth.
His eyes burn into mine, and he presses his hand to the soft skin of my abdomen, "Our child, here. Impregnate you, I'm going to impregnate you!"
An illicit excitement takes over my brain, and thin semen leaks pitifully from my shaft as Ralph's seed spills into me, invasive, molten and full.
He shivers against me, and protecting my torso with his large hands, he bites into my shoulder. Pain ruptures dully through my neck, and I clasp him weakly to my chest.
"Can you feel my seed?" He murmurs, voice hoarse, blood smearing his ruby red lips, "Here," his hands stroke my abdomen, "Our child."
I smile faintly, caressing his soft head, running my fingers through his hair whorl, "Yeah, I can feel it."
The raged delirium fades slightly from the sea of his eyes, and he smiles, almost sweet, almost innocent. Nuzzling my chest, he breaths in my scent and plays with the sticky cum coating my body.
Another throb from his bite on my shoulder tangs through the blank after-sex relaxation. My eyes sweep across Ralph and the empty space around us. This is bad. This is very bad. Even if I wanted to stay, I'll still get pulled out when Ralph wakes up from this 'dream'. But what will happen to this Shadow afterwards? A slow nausea itches my stomach.
     "At that moment you wouldn't be the one tethering his Shadow, you'd be the one unleashing it. And once that happens, once he loses all rationality, do you think you'd be able to stop him?"
     No, frankly, I wouldn't be able to.
     I shuffle in his envelopment, but before I can find a comfortable position against the cooling lap of liquid, his grip tightens fanatically around my waist again. What? But the boiling of the sky makes everything infinitely clear. His eyes cool and search the deformed horizon with a tight wariness. One second, two seconds, three seconds, nothing passes but the bubbling of the sky.
     Then, a strange sensation passes over me. It's as if all weight has been stripped off me, and I'm floating upwards even though Ralph still pins me under him. My body burns bright like I have molten light running through my vessels, and as the light strips away, I melt away the same as disintegrating ash. Weariness spreads through my body and heart, but I make myself look at the distraught horror splashing over Ralph's face.
     His eyes widen, his pupils squeeze into tight slits, and his hands grab out, trying to catch my dispersing body, "No, no, no, no, no no no—
     And he screams.
     And I know I fucked up again.

     Pain thunders through my body. My eyes tremor open, and I take a huge gasping breath of air. Straightening up, pain rips through my head and back, but I'm intact and still alive and no longer specks of disappearing light. I hug my head in my hands and take a deep breath. God, Ralph, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
     Warm stickiness kisses my hands; I lower my hands and blurry dark red blooms into my vision. Shit, shit, shit. My chest heaves, and a ringing bursts into magnificence within my ears. Wait, yes, that's right, I was in a car crash. Leonard's car crashed.
     I crawl shakily to my feet and survey my surroundings. Grey pavement surrounds me, and everything is obscured by a thick, milky fog - the exact same as the one lapping outside the car windows. I make a weak step forward, different aches shooting up my spine and limbs. Thank god I didn't break any bones. But how the fuck did I get here from the car?
     "Leonard? Hoplin? Delia?" I shout, voice distant and weak in my ears.
     No one answers.
     I take another step forwards, and another, and another. The whole scene seems to blur and fade and re-focus, and a smudge of white and brown seeps into view. That's... the white plastic shelter of a stall! I spin around, and a wave of dizziness assaults my head. This is a market place, somewhere, but why isn't there anyone?
     "Is there anyone?" I shout louder.
     A small gust of wind blows the fog away, revealing a large square paved with grey tiles and a small, elaborate marketplace at the centre, but before I can get a closer look, another rolling onslaught of fog takes its place.
     "Fuck." I stretch out my hands and wander in the direction of a cafe I thought I saw some ten metres away, "Anyone here? Anyone at all?!"
     Silence answers ominously again, but amidst the pant of my breath, is a small rustling. Plastic in the wind? But there's no wind.
     "Please help me! I'm lost and injured!"
     A true silence replies to my call. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten— Clack, clack, clack. Yes! The sound of shoes against pavement resounds closer and closer, and slowly, through the heavy mist, two small leather-shoe clad feet come into view.
     Two pale legs, a tailored pair of stiff black shorts, a clean white shirt, two pale arms, two small hands, a slender neck, a dainty face, glossy gold hair, and a cute little boy steps in front of me.
     "Ahh...Thank you for coming." I smile awkwardly down at him.
     My vision blurs again, but even through the muddled colours, I can see that his delicate features are frozen in place apathetically, as if nothing in this world mattered at all.
     He looks up, my sight clears, shock travels like an electrical current over his familiar features, my heart stops, a wide, wide smile expands sweetly over his face:
     "Mama!" And he jumps into my arms.

-

AN: I'm quite a sucker for dirty talk, but Ralph's just too uptight for that even in his shadow form...Ah, sigh. Some CUTE moments coming up!