RisingStar- Another rise[COMPLETED]

Chapter 17: Her reasons

(Canon's POV)

My whole body was drenched in cold sweat, dripping down face that was hovering over the sink, mixing with the weird smelling and odd-looking liquid-but-not-liquid-pulp.

The stench of vomit burning in my nose, tears flowing down my face while I restrained another wave of nausea and the weird pressure on my stomach, slowly making its way up to my throat again.

Between breathing and vomiting there was only the sound of flowing water to drown the groaning.

This is the worst, but I can't let them notice what is up.

As soon as I was sure the last bit of my stomach was emptied to not make an accident next to them, I turned off the sink and regarded myself in the mirror.

My reflection seemed very strange, not the blurriness but the overall look on it.

That's me, that's me, that's me.

I told myself and took out my toothbrush and put a decent amount of toothpaste on it, squeezing the little tube heavily for the second time this morning.

The trigger of all this was that I woke up from a nightmare just to realize it wasn't one, and this wasn't the first day it happened.

Moreover, this is the usual thing that happens.

Suddenly their faces popped up again, the mirror vanished, in front of me the big stage, the sickening stage lights that burned their oversaturated light right on me, like a criminal being interrogated.

Their faces watching me with hate, with spite, with sadness, regret, remorse.

'You will see.'

I already saw, but for what?

Makii's face looking worried, Mina's face sad and bitter, Varoe's face that wanted to kill me, K who didn't give me a second glance and all the other expressions.

But especially the Maknae-line, their gazes burned right into me.

Like a hope that didn't die but somehow is half-withered.

And on the side Varoe and Zeya playing around with them like I used to do, happily smiling and laughing, fighting and getting into arguments.

My replacement, there was no way she wouldn't have thought of that.

I didn't notice I had clawed my nails into the skin of my left arm until I felt a sting.

That freaking monster of a company president, she was the only one who is taking the easy way here, leaning back while I had to suffer.

Of course, it wouldn't matter if I would become the bad guy if she was the one shining brightly in the public.

Another rush of nausea rushed through me and I clapped my hand over both nose and mouth.

But this is the way I chose anyways, no complaining Canon.

'I remembered clearly, right before the real interview I had met her, all alone for the first time.

Baek Eun-Kyung gracefully sitting on her big brown leather chair wearing a smug smile and resting her chin on her fingers which were intervened. The personification of confidence. I clenched my fists and stepped forward looking down while she didn't move her body just her eyes staring up, still the smug smile on her face. "There is only one favour I am asking for", I inquired my voice shaky and full of fear. The most unexpected thing would have been that I didn't need to argue or persuade her. She nodded and leaned back, an eerie smile on her face, "Dear Canon, I think our goals would overlap, even though they aren't fundamentally the same. Even if you would tend to crumble, would you still be able to do it?", that question was not there in order to be answered. For the first time with confidence I had nodded, "I won't crumble."'