Love me back (Bill Kaulitz fanfiction)

be that nice about yourself

"Um, what are you doing?" I asked.

Bill grunted in annoyance.

"That idiot Tom stole my phone before I could steal his and I think he hid it somewhere in the room."

"Why did he do that?" I asked, still confused.

"Because then, he could answer the phone and go out, which means he's the one who's going to drive tonight, not me."

I looked at him, even more confused. He sighed.

"It's a siblings' thing, don't ask." Bill replied before he shouted. "Come on, Tom! Where is it? Tell me now!"

"I'll help you find it." I said and looked under the bed.

"Never mind." he said and went out of the room, pissed-off. "I'll go ask him. Tom!"

When we both went at the door and called him, we saw him and Sarah talk in the distance, which made us both go quiet. When I saw my best friend laugh, I smiled. They both seemed to get along pretty well.

"She's a magnet for people." I commented. "I told her she couldn't be alone for long."

"Same for Tom." Bill said. "People go to him naturally ever since we were little. He's always been the most talkative of us both. I was the quietest, so I didn't mind."

"Tell me about it." I said and smirked. "When I was younger, I would always live in Sarah's shadow because I didn't want people to notice me. I used to tell her I wish I were a ghost, like Casper: neither body nor appearance to care about and just all my invisible love to share with humans."

"I don't get you." Bill suddenly said and looked me in the eyes. "You can say such sweet things about others. Why can't you be that nice about yourself?"

I sighed.

"What can I say, Mr Kaulitz?" I replied calmly. "You guys grew up handsome, popular and successful. You don't know what it's like to be born shy and ugly, a failure."

"Stop it, you are not a failure." Bill said and cupped my face with both hands to make me stare back at him. "Listen to me. You are beautiful." he articulated slowly. "You're a beautiful person, really."

"I am?" I asked softly.

"Yes, you are. And you're sweet, you're kind, you're honest-"

I closed my eyes and kissed him on the lips. His face was so close to mine, his voice so sweet to my ears I couldn't help it. I felt Bill freeze, surprised. He didn't push me back but he didn't kiss me back either. After a few seconds, when I parted from him, he bowed his head and went silent.

"I guess that won't be enough, huh?" I declared sadly and paused as he stared at me. "It's okay." I then said and smiled. "I wish you good luck. I'm sure you'll find somebody to love too. And thank you for the rest, Bill Kaulitz. Good night."

I went back inside and closed the door as he went back to the car where Tom was waiting for him, alone. I then heard knocking on my door and opened again. It was Sarah.

"It's me again!" she replied and chuckled. "Tom told me he hid his brother's phone in your bedroom so I suggested you and I go check one last time, maybe? Or do you prefer we look for it tomorrow?"

"Oh, er, well," I stammered. "I'm sorry but I'm pretty tired. We walked a lot today. So I suggest I look for it by myself and I'll call when I retrieve it, okay?"

"Sure, no problem. You're okay?" she asked innocently.

I nodded, choking more and more.

"Like I said," I replied in a small voice, smiling but tears falling on my cheeks. "I'm really tired tonight so I'll just go to bed right away if you don't mind."

Without a word, Sarah nodded with a serious look on her face and hugged me once again. Something told me she knew what was going on. However, she then left and I could finally close the door. Even when I was alone again, I still withheld my tears and took a deep breath. I was a big girl, after all.