Stronger || PJM

Ch25: All In Vain

Jimin and Lee sit in comfortable silence at the bus stop. Jimin looks down at their hands which are a few centimetres apart, fighting the urge to hold their hand.

Why do i want to do that?, He asks himself. What's with the strong sudden urge to feel her touch? Is he really that desperate for affection? Maybe he's been feeling lonely lately. Or maybe..

I like her? Jimin goes stiff. No way.

His heart beats fasten as his eyes fall on her face. He takes in her round sharp eyes, her small nose and lips, the fading acne scars scattered over her cheeks and the mole by her right eyebrow, her damp hair that's now in a high ponytail and the scars on her knuckles. They're all details that make her beautiful in his eyes.

"The fuck is wrong with you?"

Jimin blinks, her question pulling him out of a trance as he realises she's looking back at him.

"What?"

"I called you like a hundred times. The bus is here," She says, pointing at the bus, "And you've been staring at my face for a long time and smiling like an idiot."

"Oh." Jimin feels heat rising to his cheeks, so he looks away to avoid her eyes, hastily grabbing the crutches and standing up. "I think i just zoned out a bit."

They get on the bus, Lee taking the window seat and Jimin beside her. He freezes for a second after sitting down, not knowing where to put the crutches as he's holding them up uncomfortably, so Lee offers to hold one while he holds the other, and they sit in more silence.

Jimin tries not to look at her again to avoid embarrassment, but he can't help but glance at her to see her eyes on something else. He averts his gaze to where she's looking, which is a young woman sitting a few seats away, applying a lipstick as she holds a mirror in her hand.

Jimin looks back at Lee. "You never really use makeup, do you?"

She blinks and turns her head to him, replying after a few seconds. "I don't really know how to."

"Well, do you want to?"

"When I was a teenager, I did," She says, turning her head to look out of the window, "Especially in highschool when all the other girls would use it. But I couldn't exactly afford it. And when I could, I realised I have more priorities than feeling pretty and trying to fit in."

Jimin doesn't know what to say, so he looks ahead and stays silent, feeling his heart hurt a little bit at realising how much she wanted to have a normal life like everyone else but couldn't because of her tough childhood. She had to mature early, put her life at risk to save her only family from a corrupted household. It made Jimin even more fond of her, looking up at her a little more.

"I really... " Jimin trails off.

"What?" She asks, looking back at him.

"I just," He hesitates, his heart pounding in his chest, "I think I... "

He looks at her eyes, and the words get stuck in his throat. He can't say it.

"Nothing," He finally says, his heart beats slowing down, "Forget it."

"Ah, I hate this," She whines, sliding back in her chair, "If you have something to say, just say it!"

Jimin chuckles. "Sorry, I forgot what I was about to say."

Lee stares at him blankly. She doesn't believe him. He knows she doesn't. But she shrugs it off anyway, looking away.

---

"I'm home," Lee says as she walks in, kicking off her shoes by the door before walking straight to the kitchen.

She opens the fridge as Jungkook walks in. "Hey."