Feeling Emotions

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My teacher who loved to give us group and partner work, decided to have mercy on us and let us work by ourselves for the day.

I shifted in my seat, not able to pay attention to the worksheet in front of me as I was faced with another problem: why did I hate Seth?

He was apart of the Three Musketeers, but he never actively participated in their cockblocking ways unless I was in danger or doing something stupid, which admittedly was a lot, so it was only slightly understandable.

So is this hate by association?

I shook my head. No way. I don't hate Seth just because he hung out with my brothers; I can't possibly be that petty. I searched through my internal list of reasons why I hated Seth, but they were all petty as hell.

1. Cockblocker
2. Has his own car
3. He hangs out with my brothers
4. His puppy dog eyes
5. He's hot
6. Bossy

I blinked, coming to a realization. So I don't hate Seth?

I glanced at him, where he sat with his head bent over his desk as he helped the girl who'd turned around to get his help with our worksheet.

The girl beamed at him and his eyes crinkled in a swift smile before the girl turned back around and his smile dropped, falling into a neutral expression.

Heat licked at my stomach and I frowned, continuing to stare at his side profile illuminated by the sunlight.

Are you kidding me? Seth was hot. It didn't help that the sunlight made it look like he was coming from heavens gates. How is he so hot and I didn't realize?

More heat licked at my cheeks and I couldn't take my eyes off him. What is this feeling? It felt like anger, but something was off.

I watched as Seth's head lifted slowly and turned. The second brown eyes met hazel ones, I freaked and looked away, all my attention focused on my paper.

I paused, coming to terms with the fact that I freaked out because I met eyes with Seth. What the hell was that? Something was rolling around in my stomach. Am I gonna be sick? Is that why my face is hot?

I took a deep breath and let my stomach calmed down as well as my face. Risking a glance at Seth, I regretted it immediately when I saw how he'd propped his head up with hand and was staring at me, a small smile on his face.

The heat and stomach rolling made me gulp as we stared at each other. What the absolute fuck is this? His smile grew and I started sweating slightly.

Nope. No. Fuck no. I got up from my chair and asked the teacher to use the bathroom. She looked like she was about to say no, but when she took in my appearance, she nodded with a, "Go to the nurse if you're still not feeling well."

I nodded and strode out of the class and to the bathroom where I splashed water on my face and wiped it off with the scratchy paper towels.

Staring into the mirror, I was startled to see myself. I'm literally black, a blush should not be this visible on my skin

My cheeks were flushed a pretty pink and my hazel eyes were wide and sparkling. Wait, but I kinda look good though?

I stuck up a peace sign and immediately regretted it. Why am I the way I am?

My mind rushed back to what happened in the classroom. What was that? Similar to anger, but not quite. Hatred? I frowned. No, not that. Maybe irritation? Super anger? Disgust?

I shook my head, waving the thoughts away. Whatever branch of anger it is, it's still anger. Let's just deal with it like I normally deal with people I'm angry at. Ignore them until they apologize.

I blinked at myself in the mirror. Apologize for what? Why am I even angry?

When I didn't have an answer, I cursed, before covering my mouth, surprised at how it'd echoed in the bathroom.

Dragging a hand down my face, I groaned. "I'm seventeen years old and don't know my own emotions," I muttered. "This is bull."

I threw my paper towel away and stormed out of the bathroom and back to class when a familiar voice called my name.

I whirled and saw Cecilia. A smile bloomed across her and my face as we walked over to each other.

"I thought you said you were going to call me?" she said, golden eyes sparkling.

"I was, I just get a little busy sometimes."

She smirked and my heart jumped. She's so hot.

"You're going to have to make it up to me."

I raised myself on the balls of my feet, brushing my lips against her ear, enjoying how she shuddered. "Of course. Your house after school?"

She nodded and when I moved to leave, she stopped me with an arm around my waist, before pressing her soft lips against the crook of my neck in a gentle kiss.

She pulled away, and with a wink, she rounded the corner and was gone.

When I arrived back at the classroom, eyes were pulled to me before they slid away, but Seth's eyes narrowed and he got up and met me at my desk.

That different anger took over me and I frowned. "What?"

His face was rigid, but he wouldn't take his eyes off my neck.

I froze, knowing what he was looking at immediately. Cecelia wore trademark lipstick. There was no way there wasn't a mark and there was no way that he didn't know who made it.

I reached into my backpack and pulled out baby wipes, before wiping the lipstick off. When I was finished, he was still staring at the same place. "Is it still there?"

He shook his head.

"Then what are you staring at?"

His hand inched out slowly and his thumb brushed over the spot where the lipstick had been and I shivered, before pulling away, staring at him.

He frowned, staring at his thumb, before shoving away from my desk and heading back to his.

I stared after him. What was that?

My heart was thumping, and my face was hot again.

What the fuck is this?

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