broken (k.p.)

I Thought It Was You

The dinner with Bonnie had me in a confused spiral. I was so out of place, so we decided to look more into what was going on.

There could be a chance that Kai is alive.

I want to know if it's true.

We went to Damon and Stefan's considering their large selection of books. I don't know what we were looking for, though, because I don't think these books have a manual on how to find your maybe-not-so-dead boyfriend.

Everyone is helping us flip through these books. I don't get the point, though. We can't find anything.

There's a map laid in front of us in case the locator spell finally works, but what's the point? I slam the book that I'm flipping through shut. Everyone's heads whip towards me.

"What's wrong, Elle?" Damon asks.

"Stop. Just stop. There's no point in doing this anymore. We've been looking through these books for hours trying to find something when there's obviously nothing to be found. Just give it a break. Please. We won't find him. He's gone." I whisper the last words. Elena walks over to me and gives me a small smile.

"Don't say that. He's alive, he has to be. We'll find him, we promise." She says as she places her hands on my shoulders. I smack her hands off and back away a bit.

"Oh, would you give it a break?" I ask, my voice raising. "He's gone! Stop raising my hopes when I saw him die with my own eyes! Just stop!" I scream. Books go flying. Candles go flying. I'm pretty sure Elena goes flying.

Well, she deserved it, that bitch.

My eyes have been closed since I started screaming, but I feel small hands on my cheeks. I open my eyes to Bonnie looking at me with a calming expression.

"Elle, hey. It's okay. Breathe in, breathe out. Just go outside. Calm down. We got this." She whispers. I can feel my bottom lip start to quiver.

I can't cry.

It will make all that badass stuff look not-so badass.

I nod and turn to walk out the door. I'm barely a step out the door when I hear a small gasp. I quickly turn around and walk back inside the room, and I see Bonnie picking up the map.

"Bonnie? What's wrong? Did something happen?" I ask frantically.

"It worked," She whispers. "The locator spell says...Portland."

I can feel something come up in me. I don't know if it's thankfulness, or eagerness, or what.

All I know is this is our sign that Kai is alive.

We just need to go find him.

"Are you sure you don't want anyone else to come with you?" Damon asks. I open the door to the driver's seat while Bonnie opens the passenger door.

"I just want Bonnie with me. If we do find him, I want it to just be me and him together. Plus, Bonnie is my favorite." I joke, sticking my tongue out. Damon also sticks his tongue out in response. We get in the car and shut the doors.

"Be safe." Damon says. I smile and nod.

When I was younger I would wish for siblings. Older or younger, it didn't matter because I just wanted someone to take care of or someone who would take care of me. But they could also be a best friend.

Bonnie was always that missing part. She's my best friend, but she's also my family.

Damon and Stefan are like that. Especially Damon. Damon can laugh with me, but he's always being protective.