Rebel Rebel |harry styles| - ongoing

TWENTY-SIX

U2: You're The Best Thing About Me

A/N: Fleabag spoiler! If you've never seen the series, which I highly recommend, I'd suggest checking it out before reading this.

Harry

"I love you, you incredible human.", the sound of Essie's voice woke me up, but I kept my eyes closed, afraid that opening them would make this moment disappear into thin air. It was her feeling, for the moment, and she wasn't planning on sharing it with me yet, so I felt that letting her know I heard it would be like invading her privacy.

She loved me. She really loved me. Ess was very loving towards me, not that I ever doubted she'd be, but that was why I couldn't understand all the fears that made her steer clear of relationships in the past. It felt nice knowing that she was breaking down those walls with me, she was jumping over the barriers slowly, one by one, and letting me in. I loved her back... no question about it. The past months have been wonderful, more wonderful than they should've been. In fact, the amount of fun I was having with Essie almost made me feel guilty because I knew the world around us was kind of crumbling. We, on the other hand, were in a little bubble of our own habits, rituals, slowly getting to know ourselves as a couple. I was finally certain that I made a good decision by waiting, because we'd never be where we are now if we'd gotten together at the beginning. We weren't proper friends then, we only wished to become them.

I had fears of my own regarding our relationship. We were good together when we were hidden from the eyes of the world. But what will happen once we come out of hiding and show our faces for all to see? Will we manage to keep what's important to us, private? Will we be torn apart by the tabloids? Is Essie even ready for the whole world to know, when she still wants us to keep her closest friends in the dark? There were a lot of uncertainties surrounding us, but the entire world was filled to the brim with uncertainties – questions like when and if we will be able to travel, work, play and love in the way we used to – and we had learned how to adapt to them. Against our nature, the nature that wants order and peace, we've accepted the chaos and disorder that has flooded our everyday lives. It wasn't the easiest thing to do, and I wouldn't have survived it as well as I have without constantly talking to Essie. So whatever questions I have floating around about us and the future – I need to talk to her about it all.

The next morning was hectic, making sure we haven't left anything of importance behind, because we weren't sure when we'd be back in Los Angeles. Jeff texted a million times, making sure we were ready and on our way in time. Essie was oddly quiet, which was normal given the circumstances. We'd gotten tested two days ago, so that we could travel without fear. It was also a requirement to even get on the plane, and I was thankful for that.

"Are you set? We need to leave soon.", she'd walked the entire house twice already, frantically searching for misplaced items she might miss if they were to get left behind.

"Yes, I'm ready. Let's go home, babe.", and we did... hand in hand, we locked the doors and shuffled our luggage to the car Jeff ordered for us.

Since this flight was packed with important people, there was a private gate we could use, not that there were many people travelling that could spot us and sell the photos to the tabloids. Ess was a bit surprised when she saw Adele, Chris Martin, Gary Lightbody from Snow Patrol, and other people we were both used to seeing on the television or on a stage. Adele and I met years ago and had become quite good friends since then, so it was lovely seeing her, and Essie hit it off with Gary. He was the nicest bloke, and I knew she'd like him.

"Are you as nervous as I am?", she asked me once we took off.

"It's a weird set of emotions travelling through my veins now. A mixture of excitement and nervousness, a bit of anxiety from being cooped up inside for so long. I almost forgot that the world still exists, just like before, but it was us that were avoiding it out of safety.", her hand grabbed onto mine, meeting my gaze with a warm one.