The secrets I keep

Recovery

*Jonathan*

'Alright. Painkillers.'

I made my way down the stairs and paced through the isolated hallway, my steps echoing ever so quietly as i approached the living room.

Luke exited, staring down at me with emapthy - I hate when he does that. Hes like an older brother to me but the guy is way too caring, itll probably end up getting him killed one-day.

"You feeling alright? You look pale.." he states, making his way over to me and placing the back of his hand gently on my head, furrowing his frows as I moved back to get him off me, "You look like youre gonna pass out dude, whats up? Is Evan alright?"

"Y-yeah-" I choke out, trying not to cry as the sight of Evan being beaten played on repeat in my head. "Brock sent me to get the painkillets from Nogla, hes just woken up and is in pain."

"Figures.... Oh yeah, here." He smirks, placing his hand in his back pocket, pulling out some painkillers and handing them to me "I was actually on my way up to give them to him."

"Oh, uh thanks," I smile and nod, turning away and beginning to head back upstairs.

"Its no prob, let Evan know that I miss my owl bestie." He grins before turning on his heel and heading back to the living room, I laugh silently at my friends personality.

I enter Evans room again, seeing Brock mumbling something to him with a sad smile - Vanoss' eyes are closed and his hands are clutching the covers like its his lifeline.

"Psst-" I whisper, catching Moos attention as he turns and faces me "Is he asleep?"

"No, its just to tone down his headache" He smiles kindly, fully turning his body to me - god this man acts like a parent.

"Here, Luke was actually heading up to give these to us," I whisper, handing him the box of tablets, watching as he puts two into his hand and gently shakes the youngest awake.

Evan stirs and opens his eyes in a tired daze, sitting up slowly and taking the tablets from Brock: swallowing them without water - how the fuck does he do that?

I laugh quietly as the Canadian lies back down, his hands clutching a pillow from what I assume was Waynes side and burying his face in it.

Moo just sighs before standing up and turning to me, leaning down to my ear "Ill leave you two alone, you were able to cheer him up last time but I cant get him to smile at all - ive literally tried everything but theres nothing I can do.."

'Not again'

"Alright ill try... I cant promise anything though," I mumble as Brock pats me on the shoulder before exiting the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

I move my eyes to Evan who was still curled around Waynes pillow, his eyes were emotionless as he started at the empty wall.

"You can leave yknow, ill be okay." He numbly mumbles as he turns his head to me.

"Nah, I promised Luke id bring his owl bestie back, also Moo wants to see you smile again."

He doesnt respond, instead choosing to turn back away from me, pulling the pillow to his chest.
I moved over to Brocks seat and sat down, getting a better view of the other.

He was dressed in a mustard short sleeved shirt and black jeans, his arms were securly wrapped in fresh bandages.

I thought he was only injured on the face and chest...

"Sorry but youre stuck with me until i make you smile, Brock would murder me if I left you alone like this."

"Hes not my dad.."

"Well he does care about you, speaking of, youve never spoken about your family - how are they?" I question, leaning my elbow on the arm chair as i slide down it to get more comfortable.

"I havent heard from them in years, last time we spoke was when i chose youtube over sports... they werent happy." He mumbled, still facing away from me.

"If you dont mind me asking, what were they like?" Now im curious.

He turned and faced me, carefully sitting up and leaning on the headboard: Waynes pillow still clutched in his arms.

"Do you really wanna know? No ones ever asked about them before..."

"Of course I do, I wanna get to know you more" I smiled, watching as he anxiously shifted.

"W-well they were the perfect couple when I was younger. They were so happy in pictures I saw, especially the one my aunt took of my dad proposing to my mother." He paused, taking a deep breath - his face becoming glum "However when I came along, they were so excited - putting so much pressure on me at school, sending me to clubs while they worked."

"They seem like great people."

"Thats what I thought..."

"What do you mean?" I furrowed my brows at the Canadian.

"One night I came downstairs, my dad was watching tv while drinking alot of beer - mother was nowhere to be seen. I asked if he was okay but he just drank." He began playing with loose strings on the pillow as he continued. "Dad told me that he lost his job... and that mum cheated on him with her boss.."

"How old were you?"

"Uhm 7 or 8 i cant remember. Dad lost his mind with alcohol addiction so mum and I moved into an apartment, her getting a raise from her boss so she still continued to pay for my clubs. I didnt see dad for 4 years until he visited on my 12th birthday, saying hed changed."

"Did he?.." I swear to god if that fucker hurt him.

"I.... I thought he did, however he had moved onto smoking and drank occasionally. Mum allowed him to take me on the weekends but i dreaded it. He neglected me, insulted me and on some occasions hit me."

"Ev you dont have to carry on-"

"He would blame me for mums affair, how he lost his job, how i was a disappointnent to his name." Vanoss sighed and continued one last time "The last time we spoke was when i moved out, saying i wanted a career in gaming - he laughed and insulted me a few more times before i just took off and didnt go back."

"What about your mother?"

"She moved back in with him,saying she loved him, yada yada yada. She was caring, the type of person i dont wanna let go - the opposite of Wayne and dad. But she doesnt pick up my calls anymore."

I didnt respond and just listened,  he opened up so easily which makes me wonder: did he need someone to talk too before wayne? But he never did because no one bothered to ask?

"Oh! I almost forgot" he snapped me out of my thoughts, opening the bedside drawer and pulling out an object, handing it to me "I got it ages ago but I knew wayne would kill me if i gave it to you. However hes nit here now."

I looked down at the stuffed, brown bear. It held a bat in its paw and wore a blue jacket.

"It reminded me of you so I had to get it" he yawned

"I love it Ev, thankyou" I smiled while playing with the bat "I think you should get some rest, ill carry on trying to cheer you up when you wake up"

He nodded and lay back down, holding the pillow to his chest again as he closed his eyes. I switched off the lights as i stood up, walking to the door and stepping out, glancing back at Vanoss with a sad smile.

"We miss you dude."