His Red Rose

i

. . .

Edited

" I'm sorry for your loss"

" She flatline about an hour ago"

" Her body rejected the treatment "

" There's nothing we can do"

" We're very sorry for your loss"

Numb. That's all I could feel. It was as if I didn't have control of my own body. Like I was a ghost a shell of myself. I could barely hear a word they said, yet for the past weeks it's all I could hear repeating in my mind.

We're sorry for your loss.

Those words seems so empty. I felt numb and cold, no anger or sadness in my body just numb like I didn't know how to feel. The last time I ever had this feeling in me was with him.

Not knowing how to feel. Not knowing what I feel. Just staring at the wall opposite of my bedroom for the past hours. Thoughts ran through my mind yet none of them stuck long enough for me to focus. Everything seemed like a blur. Even now when I have to pack up my whole life to move in with five strangers I barely know.

My brother

I will laugh right now if I didn't feel so empty. I would laugh in their faces and tell them I have no brothers. Told them it's a mistake I don't know them I don't know any of them . But I couldn't find the power in me to even say a word except from nod. As if the life has been drained out of me.

She was all I had to live for. One of the only people who loved and understood me. Cared for me, would even die for me. She was my family my mother she was someone who I didn't need to tell to know what I was feeling. Someone who I could confide in without judgment, only understanding me.

She didn't agree with everything I did but at the end of the day she still loved me, and supported me in any way she could. Because that was just who she was.

. . .

I just stared at all the different cloths in my closet decided on what to wear. I finaly chose a pick oversize sweater and black fishnets, pared with a black beani and my black sneakers. I remember when my mom got me this outfit, she loved it when I wore it.

I left my long brown hair to flow down my back with lose light curls at the gold tips. I only put on my ear ring, cartiledge piercings, and belly button pierced. I decided to not put one my nose ring toady. I also wore my usual necklace, it is good with a red rose in the middle. My cloths cover all my tattoos cause I'm not sure if I can trust these people yet.

After I finished getting dressed I decided I should probably start getting pack since I will be leaving soon. I got out my suitcase and packed all my cloths and all my things. I got out my black back pack that has red roses on it.

I remember when he got it for me. It was after my first win as a reward, he also got me the rose necklace. I look down to my wrist where my rose tattoo is, I remember when he took me to get it, it was my first tattoo and I was so scared, clutching onto his arm like a monkey. I smile at that memory, it will always be with me even though his is not anymore.

Breaking out of my daydream I got up and started packing some things into my backpack. I got my phone charger, makeup the essentials then started packing my more important ring. I also packed some photos of me and my mom and some of him. I miss them so much. I grabbed my gun, it is black with a red rose on either side of it. And grabbed my knife sticking it my waist hosted and shoe, I also have one on the inside of my thigh.

After I was done packing I headed out the front door and a black Mercedes waited for me. I myself had money, but with all of moms medical bills I don't save alot to buy the the unnecessary things. I do have a couple of sports car but that's only used for my job. I usually use my motorcycle, but I already shipped it over.

Before she died i was saving for me and mom, to buy a house in the city overlooking the entire city. It was moms dream she loved the busy city with the lights and the people, but she decided to give that up to live in a quiet neighborhood, where u can grow up safely. But now that she's gone I don't know what I'm even gonna do next.

At first I didn't understand why she would want to live in a busy city. A place where people push past you on the street to get to their destination on time.

But now I get it. She felt free. A place where people don't stop to take a second look at you to question you a place where you can do anything you desire without people looking at you like you were some strange creature.

A place where you can do whatever you like because it doesn't matter. A place where you can live your life just how you want to.

That's the type of place I want to be in somewhere I can just drown in the background, no attention on me just living my life like a normal person. Yet I know I can never have a quiet peaceful life like that.

No matter what I did or didn't do in my life, It was all written ahead of me, because of the blood that runs in my veins.

The thought of living with my five brothers that I barely knew scared me more than I liked to admit. I have no idea who they are or even what their intentions are. I know they're my brothers but I still can't help feel unsure of my situation.

We haven't seen each other for most of our lives, why would they care for me. We don't have a brother sister bond or any bond for that matter. We're basically just strangers and me living with them someone who I barely know doesn't sit right with me.

I was so captive in my thoughts that I didn't even realize the car stopped and i stepped out to what looked like a privet jet waiting for me .

The harsh wind cause my hair to blow around wildly, as the flight attendant approached me.

"welcome Miss De Luca " the flight attendant said to me.

Goodbye California, hello New York

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My first update yay.
I'm so excited for this book but it's gotta take me awhile to finish it so please be patient.thank you