Becoming (INSECURE SEQUEL)

Six: Road Rage

AUGUST

"Yeah." Melody nods her head slowly before she tucks the picture away in her back pocket.

A dismal look comes over her face and she starts to tap the pen on the desk to distract herself. I don't want to ask her to clarify how Ashton is the baby's father, because even though I can't fathom the idea of it, I don't want to make her talk about it more when it's clearly eating away at her heart. I have so many questions, but I guess having them answered isn't that important. I hum as we stand next to each other in silence and I glance in their direction every now and again hoping Catalina's eyes don't meet mine.

"I was a worse person back then." She speaks again. "I didn't tell him, and I didn't keep her, but I had my reasons."

"Like what?"

"Like we were broken up, he was in love with Catalina, and I was the worst person he knew. So, I couldn't just walk up to him and tell him I was having his baby, to me, it was best that he didn't know and think I was lying."

"Why'd you keep it then?" I shrug.

I understand why she was afraid. I get why she wouldn't tell him when she found out: I know what it's like to be the worst person someone knows and have everyone look at you like everything that comes out of your mouth is a lie. If I was her I wouldn't have said anything either. but Ialso just wouldn't have had the baby--if I was her. I remember when she left and I hadn't seen her in a while, and I just assumed it was because she had to change her toxic surroundings in order to better herself. Now I know why she did it.

"because I knew that she'd be great." She smiles. "Just not with me. I'm sure she's great now too."

"You just don't know?" I ask because to me it seems like she's worried about the daughter she never got to know.

"I have my worries sometimes, but I just tell myself that she's doing just fine--"

"Who is?" I hear a perky voice behind me.

It startles me and right after I flinch, my first reflex is to chop them in the arm with the side of my hand. Right after I do it, I feel a sharp sensation in that side of my arm too as someone hits me back. I look up to see that the person standing in front of me is Lily.

"You hit me!" She gasps as she grabs her arm and my eyes widen.

"You scared me." I say, glad that I didn't do anything that might have hurt her.

"You know I have sensitive bones." She frowns and rubs the spot.

"I'm so sorry."

Lily rolls her eyes and shakes her head as she walks in between Melody and I and hands her file to the receptionist. I narrow my eyes at Melody. Maybe if she hadn't told me a marriage jeopardizing secrets then I wouldn't be so on edge. She's lucky no one over heard us, and she'll really be lucky if she gets to take it to the grave like she obviously intends to. Once you tell one person, things just have a way of coming out.

I start to wish that she hadn't told me, because in keeping this to myself for her, I have to feel bad about the fact that Catalina and Ashton don't know. It seems that everyone is doing fine with things the way that they are now and knowing something like this would only ruin that. I suppose ignorance truly is a bliss. Even Melody is getting her life together, but I know that the burden of wondering how her child is doing messes with her from time to time.

Lily asked who we were talking about, but I'm hoping that she was just trying to make conversation. If she really is curious, then I'd have to have the burden of keeping something from her too. I know that a lie Melody is keeping shouldn't be worth not telling my wife, but it isn't any of my business to tell anyone.