Shattered~Lashton

Nine.

-Luke-

No. No. No. It couldn't be Ashton. But it was. 

"Welcome Ashton, its okay to be late. We are just glad you showed up." Zac said, Ashton nodded keeping his head down.  

Why was Ashton here? He seemed like a genuinely happy person. I guess that isn't always the case. For what seems like the first time since I have met Ashton. He didn't have a smile on his face.

I wanted to run, I wanted to get out of this room. It felt as if the walls were closing in on me. But it seemed like my body had other plans as I sat in my seat.

He kept his graze on the floor, while mine was on him. The guy next to him went, I didn't pay much attention. Then it was Ashtons turn to talk, introduce himself to the group. I feel like most of these people knew each other, so why did they do this? Ashton took a deep breath before standing up. 

"Hi, I am Ashton Irwin and I happen to be eighteen. I'm here because three years ago I became anorexic. I overcame it this past year, slowly getting better and yea....guess that's it." He looked at everyone, besides me. 

I felt my  heart slightly drop hearing this. If you looked at Ashton you wouldn't see this, you wouldn't think for a second that this had happened. I know he eats lunch everyday, so like he said he is getting better. I stare at him, waiting for that moment he looks up. He looks up but sees me looking at him and quickly looks away. Soon its my turn. I was going to pass but having Ashton here, I go. I slowly stand up. Everyone looking at me, besides Ashton. I start to panic. I don't like the attention. But I go on anyways. 

"I'm Luke Hemmings, I am seventeen. I guess I'm here because...."  I rub my wrists. Not even realizing I was doing it. 

"Luke, its okay we won't judge you. Or you can just pass on the reasoning for now." Zac gives me a gentle smile. 

I shake my head, Ashton is now looking at me. "I'm here because many reasons I guess, the main reason is because a doctor saw my arms and assumed that I needed help. My brother also forced me to come." I didn't think it was that good of a reason but I quickly sat down. 

"Thank you Luke." The rest of the people go. I shift uncomfortably in my seat. 

"So what do you guys want to talk about today?" Zac asks, the room goes silent. The sound of the clock ticking is the only thing heard. Suddenly a girl speaks. 

"How's your crush thing going Ash?" 

-Ashton-

I was surprised to see Luke here, no wonder he told me he had plans with his brother. His brother forced him to come, I could tell he didn't want to be here. I felt the same way when I first joined, but the more times I came it got better. 

"How's your crush thing going Ash?" Jessica asks. I start to get nervous. 

I've told the group about my crush, I know they won't judge and I am okay with telling them these things. The thing is, my crush is Luke. My eyes look up to Luke, only to find his eyes already on me. I remember I never told the group his name so I guess that's okay. 

"I don't know, I think he doesn't like  guys." I said sadly. I knew Luke was straight, another person I could never call mine. 

"How do you know that? Have you ever seen him with a girl?" I shook my head. "I just know it, we've became closer friends though." I gave the group a sad smile.

I didn't understand why everyone was always asking about this topic with me. It was awkward, knowing Luke was sitting right there. I'm sure it was only awkward for me though. He didn't know I had a crush on him. 

"What's his name?" A different girl asked, I didn't remember her name. She only joined last week. 

I opened my mouth to say something but closed it. I couldn't say his name, for fucks sake he was sitting right there! 

I looked at Luke and he was playing with his piercing. God he was hot. 

"Please tell us his name! We don't even know the guy and I would like to refer to him using his name." Oh but you do know the guy. 

"That's enough, if Ashton doesn't want to tell us his name, he doesn't have to." Zac smiled at me and I returned the smile. Mouthing a small thank you. 

The rest of the time we talked about random things, Luke stayed silent. As soon as Zac dismissed us. Luke ran out of the room, I ran to the door. 

"Luke! Luke!" I yelled after him, I started to run after him but decided against it after a few steps. I watched him run down the hallway, just like I did that day when I defended him. 

I walked back into the room to find just Jessica in there, everyone else left. 

"Its Luke isn't it?" She asked, giving her a confused look I asked, "What?"

She picked up her bag, "Your crush...its Luke. I can tell just how you look at him." I felt my cheeks go red. Was it really that easy to tell.

"Yeah your right." I admitted. She smiled, "Don't worry, I think he has something for you too. Just not ready to admit it. Don't pressure him." With that she walked out of the room leaving me alone. 

A part of me wished that she was right, but how would she know? I shook my head, because she doesn't know. She's just guessing and I couldn't get my hopes up like I always do. My phone went off, I checked it and I had a text from Luke. 

Luke:

Do you want to hang out? Like right now?

I smiled to myself, I quickly sent a yes. He sent another text saying he was outside in the parking lot. I made my way to the parking lot, smiling like an idiot.