余波 | aftermath

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~仕始める~

Yushiro was shaking, throat raw from the screaming he'd been doing for the past week. His head pounding, as he let out another blood curdling scream.

"My lady... My lady!" He desperately called out, his voice hoarse.

It felt like sandpaper against my eardrums as I sat outside the room. The sounds weren't muffled, they were full of pain and longing. It was agonizing to hear, I've known Yushiro since Tamayo first gave him medicine when he was human.

The longing in his eyes, and the agony in his voice, and I'm helpless. I'm not going to lie, I knew this was going to happen, but it's been two entire weeks and he's been letting him grief swallow him whole. He loved Tamayo, genuinely, with everything he had.

Swallowing the lump in my throat, and ignoring the rock in the pit of my stomach I slid the shoji door open. As soon as the light landed on his back, the screams ceased to the mere sound of his heavy breathing. Yushiro turned to meet my pained gaze.

"(Y-Y/N), she's gone (Y/N), never again... never again will I hear her voi-" He interrupted himself with a fit of coughs.

"Yushiro, please stop this. Don't let him win." I continued to gaze down at him, pity slowly filling my body.

"Him? Who's him?" His voice sounded like rust, so hoarse I could barley understand him, how is he able to speak?

I squatted down, looking at him straight on. "How the hell am I supposed to keep her memory alive by myself while all you do is babble about her being gone?" I spoke swiftly.

"Huh..?" His voice was soft, hardly a whisper. "What- What do you mean?"

"Am I supposed to carry on her memory all by myself?"

"N-no... of course not..." He mumbled.

"Lady Tamayo wouldn't want to see you torture yourself like this, I kno-"

"You don't know shit!" His raised volume surprised me, causing me to flinch at the noise. "You were never there with us! You have no idea what I'm going through!" The fury in his eyes could strike fear into anybody's heart, and for a second I felt guilty...

"No... I wasn't there, but she mattered to me too. If you're going to lock yourself up and scream for the rest of your life, then do it somewhere else! If keeping her memory alive depends on me and me only, then I don't want to babysit you!" I raised my volume towards him.

Yushiro and I never got along, he struggled with communication toward anyone and was obsessed with independence. Scuffles and even physical fights between him and I have happened before. I didn't mind his dedication to Lady Tamayo, it's hard not to fall in love with her. I was an errand runner, fetching medicines and bringing them back, so I only stayed with the couple for a while.

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