Hurt Me Again.

Broke Me.

I watched Ezekiel as he tied my wrists together but not as tightly as Jay had before, I could move them a bit in the binding, although it was a bit uncomfortable it was better.

We stood in silence as he gathered my hair in his hands and tied it into a ponytail. His hands rested on my hair a bit longer and he pressed a kiss on my forehead.

"We should probably go," I said breaking through the silence. He put his hand on my back and let me lead out to the dining room where all the other guys were.

"Finally, you're back!" Jay said chewing on my corn chips a bit loudly. "Did she let you hit when you were back there?"

"Put a sock on it dick head!" I said clicking my tongue and he clenched his jaw getting up.

"Control your bitch, Ezekiel."

"Who you calling a bitch, Jay? Feeling tough because I'm tied up, I could definitely beat your ass now that I'm prepared for it stupid ass!" I said smiling and he tried to lunge at me but the guys held him back and Ezekiel pushed me behind him.

"Let me have at her, just once!"

"Calm down, Jay!" Shawn said pushing him back and I could see the veins popping from Jay's neck.

"Yeah, calm the fuck down pussy," I teased from behind Ezekiel and Jay screamed trying to push the guys away.

"Can you just shut up Robyn?" Nev said trying to control the situation and I laughed shrugging.

"Okay."

I went back to my place and sat down on the cold floor as I watched the others try to get Jay to calm down.

"I know what you're trying to do Robyn, stop it," Ezekiel said next to me and I looked at him with an innocent smile.

"What am I trying to do Mr Ezekiel?" I asked innocently and I saw the sides of his lips twitch.

"Stop it."

I looked back to Jay, he was fuming but he had calmed down a bit, although Shawn still stood in front of him with his hand in front of Jay's chest telling him to calm down and follow the plans.

I slowly raised my hands and put up my middle fingers for him sticking my tongue out, his hands clenched by his side's and he pushed Shawn away saying he was going to get some air. He stopped and looked at me with a frown.

"This isn't over," he pointed a finger at me and slammed the door close as he left going to wherever it is he was going.

"Well, your boy gets angry quickly," I whistled talking to the boys and none of them responded. "I guess it's the whole gang then."

"Will you please keep quiet, Robyn?" Shawn asked taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes.

"Since you asked, sure." I looked over at the two other guys and realized I didn't know their names. "Sorry, but I do have a question."

"What is it now, Robyn?" Shawn asked annoyed and I smiled ignoring Ezekiel's short chuckle, yeah he's probably used to this side of me.

"What are your names, except you Shawn because we've met under a pretence situation."

"My name is Xavier," the guy who had been quiet the whole time said, he had curly brown hair and brown eyes, he looked extremely innocent but something about him reminded me of Jamal.

My panic grew gradually as I thought of my family and how much I missed them, would I ever see them again? Would there even be a body to bury?

"My name is Nev," the bold guy said and he had striking green eyes, interesting.

"Not really nice to meet you guys," I said sniffing and they nodded smiling, I guess I was left with the nice ones of the group. "I'm sure it would've been wonderful if we met each other just like the way I met Shawn and Ezekiel, we would've been great friends then."

I brought my knees up and hugged them closing my eyes, I didn't want to sleep and certainly didn't want to dream. So I sat there thinking about why I chose not to tell them what Bellamy did.

It's not like it would help the situation, I'm sure I would still be sitting here as we waited for whatever Reed's plan is. Does he want to lure Bellamy here because he has me as a hostage?

Does he want to kill me? No, Reed is an idiot but not like that for sure. He's probably angry because Bellamy found a way to kick him out of the association and take some of his top 'dog' clients.

I swear I was an idiot for falling in love with Bellamy and even getting married to him. Here I am again, getting hurt over something that he did, although it isn't him hurting me directly this time, it's still him.

It's the same pattern over and over again. I thought I had gotten rid of him from my life but it seems I just invited him into it by being blind and not seeing how Eze's story never added up or made any sense.

I had gotten so used to my loneliness that I openly invited the first male attention I received because I thought I deserved it, I thought I deserved some happiness but I guess I was wrong. I'm just a girl living for the pain and nothing else.

I felt my hair being pulled and I blinked my eyes open and saw Jay grinning at me.

"Oh, it's you. Where are the others?" I asked yawning, I had somehow managed falling asleep while thinking.

"Just us, baby," he said and I felt a sting on my cheek. Did this guy just hit me, again?

A kick met my stomach and I groaned in pain holding it.

"You know, what you said wasn't really nice," he said and I felt another kick on my stomach and I cried out in pain. "I was just trying to make a joke and you insulted me!"

He raised me by my hair and I held onto his hand laughing. "What's so funny?" he snarled and I coughed trying to get words to come out.

"I just figured you out," I breathed out heavily, it felt like the air was having a hard time getting to my lungs. "Your mother probably never laughed at your jokes, and always saw you as a disappointment."

His fist connected to my cheek and I tasted metal in my mouth, he pushed me down and I fell on my back.

"Everything you did wasn't good enough for her, whenever you tried to make her happy she would frown upon your tries and you felt unworthy," sound familiar?

"Shut up!" a hard kick met my back and I screamed, I could feel the tears run down my skin but I wasn't done.

"Oh boy, you're a failure, aren't you? You beat on women to feel like the man you wanted her to acknowledge you as don't you?" I carried on and he pulled me across the floor with my hair. He stood in front of me and I grinned looking up at him.

"You don't know a single thing about me."

"But I do know one thing," I said moving a bit back while he followed.

"What is that?"

"Having balls sucks," my foot met his groin in a hard kick and he crunched over holding onto it.

I got off the floor as quickly as I could and picked up the wooden chair that was next to me and hit his back with it. It broke into pieces but I carried on hitting him with it until he ended up on the floor.

"You remind me of Malcolm!" I screamed as I hit his face with the last piece of the wooden stool I had in my hands.

Blood kept on coming out from his face but I carried on hitting him, ignoring his cries just as he did mine. I couldn't find the will to stop hitting him and I didn't, my tears stung my skin as I kept on hitting him.

I was pulled away from him and I could hear the voice telling me to calm down. His arms wrapped themselves around my body as I broke down with all those memories crashing down on me.

"He broke me."

I chanted it like a prayer remembering the day as it clearly happened, the day I lost me.

A/n What do you guys think? I'm crying again 🤧💔 please follow my Facebook page, Fulu's Library ❤️