Review by Faye: Life's Essence

22 4 25
                                    

Title: Life's Essence

Author: Rose1677

Reviewer: Fayesther


Cover and Title (5/5)

Your cover is simple but incredibly effective! I love the use of bold black and white. I also like how the dots used behind the title could be seen as either stars or dust particles it is a clever choice, perfect for a book containing a collection of poems. The fonts chosen for both the title and other information are clear to read and pleasing to the eye. I have no qualms regarding this section.


Blurb (5/5)

I am a huge fan of poems being used in poetry books' blurbs. It is a great way to showcase your writing style to potential readers. The poem you chose to represent your work was a really well written piece. I loved that it was a poem about writing poems – a brilliant touch!


Grammar (3/5)

I noticed a few grammatical mistakes here and there and pinpointed them in comments – I find this an easier way to help out with this section. I hope you don't mind.

There are a couple of things I'd like to mention here though:

In a few poems you used colloquialisms, the use of this language was inconsistent to the main voice within your poetry collection. Therefore, when you used these slang words they seemed out of place. For example, in "I Love You" you wrote; "Maybe, I ain't meant for you." I believe it would read better if it said "Maybe, I'm not meant for you." Another example of this is writing "wanna" instead of "want to".

Be sure to steer clear from abbreviations within your writing.( I.e. "u" for "you" , "n" for "and" etc.) it doesn't add much to the content, rather, it cheapens the sentiments of the poem in my opinion.

That all being said, the majority of your writing was good grammar wise. Your use of punctuation was especially good. You managed to pace each poem really well. The rhythm within your work was never lost regarding your punctuation.


Writing Style (3/5)

This poetry collection includes poems structured really well. Through using simple, yet effective, structures to portray deep emotions, you have created consistent and balanced writing within this book.

I especially liked the more repetitive pieces. I found that these poems portrayed a sense of emotional desperation within the poem. Repeating key words puts more emphasis on them showing the reader that they are important.

An example of this is your poem called "Wait" the stanza that repeats the word "every" worked really well to portray the excruciating passing of time. The stanzas following this repetitive stanza were then written using short and snappy phrases. This was a really cool structure idea. It showcased a sense of impatience within the voice of the poem. This was very clever.

Your choice of words when you describe the deeper emotions are beautifully thought through, giving your work a sophisticated voice.

Your use of imagery in some pieces were a delight to read. One poem that used imagery really well was "To, Black Beauty". I loved this poem it painted intriguing fantastical pictures within my mind, which were dark and brooding, but beautiful. This was my favourite poem in your collection.

There were places where the imagery did not quite work in my opinion. For example, the lines within "I Love Me" that say - "Thought I was a knight in shining armour. But I'm a warrior in platinum armour." – there is no real difference between the ideas within these lines, rather, they're describing the exact same thing just in different wording. Therefore, your meaning is unclear, I don't know if you're trying to get across that you're better or worse than a knight in shining armour.

You have a consistent use of rhyme within this collection and in some poems they work incredibly well giving a good flow and rhythm to these pieces. However, I did find a few lines here and there (not many) where the word choices you made seemed to only be chosen to fit the rhyme. This caused some lines to read clumsily or lose their meaning within their context.

Some poems read just like lyrics for a song. "Was Your Lover" is a good example of this. Despite not having a rhyming scheme it had a really nice flow to it.


Originality (5/5)

Your poems are full of emotion and great ideas. I loved your use of contrasting images to help demonstrate the inner battle between positive and negative feelings that we all go through within social situations we face. This was shown simply, yet incredibly effective.

Your poetry collection gives a good balance of light and dark. Poems written to show your appreciation for family members and others that show the hardships of battling with feelings of low self worth. This book is a good representation of the reality that we all face in unique ways. Very moving and very deep.

I also have to mention, regarding this point, that I absolutely loved the small silly poem that you added onto the end of "To My Brother". That was gorgeous to read. It brought a childlike energy to your collection that was a breath of fresh air.

I liked how your poems told small stories, that were easy to follow.

Like in "I Love You" -The first stanza is a confession of love. Then the next stanza shows how an individual's inner-thoughts can get in the way, causing doubt to sneak in. You then brought it back around again, as if those negative thoughts were banished and the individual could go back to confessing their true feelings again. A lovely piece.

I really liked the stanza within "Striving Strength" –

"I will strive,

I will crave;

I will carve.

I will be brave."

This stanza is emotionally layered and read with such a catchy rhythm! Great work!

Lastly, I have to mention the Haiku! I loved it! It had a clear beginning, middle and end. This isn't easy to do with such a small amount of words. This showed your talent in writing.


Overall (21/25)

This was a beautiful collection of well structured poems that told relatable stories. Your poetry collection had a good balance of positive and negative social themes. There were some lines here and there where your meaning was unclear, but with revision will not be hard to fix. This collection as a whole includes poems that fit beautifully together. Not one poem seemed out of place in this book. Thank you so much for asking me to review this well structured poetry collection. I hope you found my feedback helpful.

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