1. Why did the man name his dogs Rolex and Timex? Because they were watch dogs.
2. My wife asked me to sync her phone, so I threw it into the ocean. I don’t know why she’s mad at me.
3. A man walks into an apiary and asks the beekeeper for a dozen bees. To which the beekeeper replies, “Sure, and I’ll throw in the 13th as a freebie…”
4. Police arrested a bottle of water because it was wanted in three different states: Solid, liquid, and gas.
5. I got hit in the head with a can of Diet Coke today. Don’t worry, I’m not hurt. It was a soft drink.
6. Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be justwater.
7. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
8. Why did the raisin go out with the prune? Because he couldn’t find a date.
9. My friend keeps saying “Cheer up man, it could be worse. You could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.” I know he means well.
10. Today, my son asked, “Can I have a bookmark?” I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn’t know my name is Brian.
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Did these horribly hilarious jokes make you giggle or groan? Comment!
I'm changing my update schedule a little, because I'm working on an actual story.
If you have any feedback or suggestions that I could use to make this book better, feel free to message me with them!
Stay safe :)
YOU ARE READING
The Book of Ultimate Randomness
RandomAre you bored? Are you looking for something funny? Do you like random things? Do you want to impress your friends (or anyone, really) with mind-blowing facts and cringe-worthy jokes? If your answer is yes (or no, it doesn't matter) then welcome to...
