Dark heart

Chapter 8

The hours passed and I found it harder and harder to stay awake. Since I couldn't take turns with Bruce I was afraid something would happen if I fell asleep and I wouldn't wake up in time. The others had left hours ago and so I sat here in complete silence, only the steady beeping of the surveillance monitor to be heard. Suddenly, however, I heard the door open and turned around in surprise. To my surprise, Loki walked in with a tray in his hand. He was the last person I expected to see here. He didn't really seem to have any friends on the team. With the others, you really only saw him at dinner. The rest of the time he spent mostly in his room or the training room. " What are you doing here?," I finally asked as he came closer. " I thought you could use some company. So someone other than the sleepyhead here. And you weren't at dinner, so I got you something to eat," he explained and placed the tray on the small side table. It was filled with sandwiches and fruits, plus a bottle of water. I looked at him, completely perplexed. I never expected such a gesture from him.

"Loki I. . . Thank you," I said, watching the smile on his face grow bigger and bigger. That was exactly the reaction he was hoping for. "It's the least I can do. You saved my life today," he reminded me and I smiled gratefully at him before tucking into the food. " Somebody's hungry," he commented with a laugh as I greedily gobbled down the first sandwich. " I'm sorry. I didn't even realize how empty my stomach actually was until you showed up," I explained meekly. " The day must have been bad for you," he was now thinking out loud, "First the Hydra base and the kids, then this with Steve, I don't even want to imagine how you must feel. " This time there was no sarcasm in his words, he was serious and he even seemed concerned. " Yes, it was. Those kids. . . They reminded me of myself. I spent six years in a cell like that and I still have flashbacks of it now. And those poor innocent children are only half the age I was back then. That's a trauma you can never get away from. And then there's Steve. He was there for me, sitting on the floor with me for hours listening and distracting me until I felt better. And he barely knew me. He didn't leave me alone and it's my duty to do the same for him now," I replied quietly and Loki nodded thoughtfully.

"I know that feeling, that everything is too much. It pushed you down and doesn't let you breathe until you feel like you're choking on it," he whispered and I was shocked at what intimate thoughts he let me in on. " I guess you've been through a lot too," I stated and only got a harsh laugh in response. " I'm over a thousand years old Alex. I've seen a lot, lost a lot. I have suffered and I have experienced joy. So yeah, I've been through a lot, as you put it," was all he said, and I could clearly hear the bitterness from his voice. " Living that long is torture," I replied, seeing him look at me in surprise out of the corner of my eye. " I thought you humans always wanted to live as long as possible and preferably be immortal?," he hiked up and I had to stifle a laugh. "No, thank you, I've had enough of a life's torments. What good is it to be immortal? You watch everyone you love die until there's no one left. A long life isn't a blessing. It's lonely", I explained to him and again he looked at me as if he hadn't expected such an answer.

"Why are you looking at me like that?," I wanted to know after a while in which he had not said another word. " You are so unlike any person I have ever met in all my years," he replied simply and again I searched for the old familiar sarcasm but it was nowhere to be found. " You talk like you have the mind of a hundred-year-old, not someone in their early twenties," he added when he noticed how suspicious I was looking at him. " Now was that a compliment or an insult?," I wanted to know shyly laughing and immediately his face became serious. " Alex I was just telling you that I think you are very wise. That's a good thing. You really impressed me, not many of your kind have managed that," he continued in a soft voice. Smiling, I looked to the ground so he wouldn't see the blush that had shot into my cheeks. Oh, God, what am I doing here? Focus, Alex!

"Sorry, I didn't mean to embarrass you," he said with a smile and I just shook my head. Never could I have imagined having such a conversation with Loki. Usually his sentences were dripping with sarcasm and he was always making fun of someone. But now he was so sincere, so absolutely honest. The only question was, which side of him was real? Again and again I had to remind myself of Tony's words. I couldn't trust Loki, he liked to manipulate people. But could someone be that good at deceiving? The looks he gave me, that mild smile he could give you. None of this could be an act. Or is it? " Are you in your mind again?," he wanted to know and I nodded with an apologetic smile. " If there's anything you want to talk about, I'm here," he offered and again I couldn't help but get lost in the green of his eyes. No, nobody could act that good.