Love Always Wins| ✓

29|° twin

<<<happy new year 🎉 here's an update!

THE SOUND of a knock on his door cuts through his thought process, snapping him out of his unpleasant reverie in which every attempt of asking Hope for forgiveness fails miserably.

He sighs, turning his head from the bed he's laying on and stares at the already turning door knob. Even before he enters, he already knows who it is; Col's appearance only confirms it. Col stands awkwardly at the door and from time to time, his weight shifts from one leg to another.

Lawrence is really really torn between watching his brother's discomfort or lessening it and a huge part of him - as much as he hates to admit it - draws satisfaction from watching Col fidget and look for something to do with himself.

It hasn't always been like this for Col. His oblivion supercedes any tension and awkwardness in a room and now that his oblivion is stamped by the awkwardness, Lawrence has to wonder if Col has indeed been reflecting on whatever he did and is ready to apologize to Hope.

God forbid that he's shown up in Lawrence's room after their argument earlier, to ask him to apologize to Hope on his behalf.

Lawrence shifts on his bed and the movement catches Col's attention who, for a moment there, looked deeply lost inside his head.

Lawrence would like very much to pride himself in their twin bond and friendship since a young age but right now, he's got to admit that he doesn't really know what is going on in his brother's head. He can tell a few of his feelings; distress, fear, guilt but that's just about it.

It makes him realize that he barely knows his brother and his brother barely knows him. They both have always held on to who each twin was growing up and barely paid attention to who each twin was becoming while at it. Has his brother's obsession with video games subsided to just a hobby? What is his current taste in music and what does it say concerning his personality?

He sighs and pats an empty space on his bed and Col's face relaxes a little into what mirrors relief as he sits down on the spot.

Lawrence leans back on his headboard, staring up at the plain porcelain ceiling in an attempt to give his brother the time, space and silence he needs to get out of his chest whatever it is that he wants to release.

It's something that he's somewhat picked up from Ndavi. He let's you feel comfortable and relaxed, giving you all the time in the world that you would need to speak while he himself speaks only when it's necessary.

He recalls their conversation earlier at the Visca Moreno about forgiving himself and truth be told, it's still a truth he's trying to come into terms with.

"Do you remember the accident?" Col suddenly asks.

Lawrence's head snaps to Col and if you were wearing sound magnifiers, you would have heard the subtle crack that the movement releases at the completely unexpected and out of the blue question.

He doesn't answer - just gapes at Col. After all, how could a day like that one be forgotten? How could such an event escape him really? It is impossible for that to happen. He has destroyed uncountable mental screens that deem themselves strong enough to replay the memory and each and every time, he's used a therapeutic strategy of his own to crack that screen and stop the onslaught of emotions.

Up until now, he'd managed to lock the memories away in a dusty box and throw away the key and no one, not even his parents have been able to tell the post traumatic stress he's gone through. He's always been strong enough to handle it though, or that's what he's told himself.

Now though, Col just forced the box open by completely breaking it down and there's no going back. There's no locking away those memories again. There's only facing them.