Cliche(A parody)

Cliche # 9: The New 'Badass' In Town

Sup, my name is The New Chick and don't fucking laugh! Yeah, I fucking curse and I love doing it! I'm currently holding my teddy bear Mr.Love Snuggles while smoking an electronic cigarette. I'm sitting in the park of the new town I moved into only a day ago. I knew that nothing eventful was going to happen. I knew that I'm not going to meet a bad boy who turns out to be a love interest or make a type of bet that will soon turn into a beautiful love story. I'm also not going to slowly open up to the said bad boy who will somehow solve all of my problems. I know for sure that the bad boy will not have a smirk permanetly on his face and acts like a prostitute that never charges their customers. I let out the puff of vapor that I was holding in and blew it slowly with a brooding, but sexy look on my face. I guess you can call me a badass-

"IS THAT A MY LITTLE PONY TOY?" The little girl who I squealed at looked at me with shock and a hint of fear.

"Y-yes." She meekly replied while holding it tighter to her chest.

"Gimme!" I whined out while holding my arms out toward her.

"No!" The brat whined while sheilding my view of the adorable toy.

"I WANT IT!" I shouted at her. This made her jut out her bottom lip and pout.

"No."

"Come on- ARGH!" I fell to the ground in agony from how hard the little girl kicked me. Tears streamed down my face on how painful the kick was.

"Stop being a little bitch." I heard the little girl say before giving me a kick to the stomach and walking away with the toy still in her hands.

"Why you-"

"You okay there?" I heard a deep and sexy voice ask me. Standing up, I got a look at the sexy voice and I almost fainted from how much of a perfect male specimen he was. He was dark all over and when I meant dark, I mean he was literally covered head to toe in black.

"I'm good." I said coolly, but couldn't hide the squeak that naturally comes into my voice.

"Who are you?" He asked in a deep and croaky voice.

"I'm The New Chick, who're you?" I asked while looking down at him. He was seriously short like he was as tall as a five year old who has a growth problem. It looked so sexy on him. I had to actually get on my knees(not complaining about that)and then actually bend down some more just to be able to make eye contact with him.

"I'm Batman." Well that kinda explains the cape and the mask.

"You're kinda um not what I expected." I said while making subtle hints about his challenging height.

"A lot of people tell me that." He shrugged. Midget Batman suddenly whipped his head around in alarm.

"What is it?" I asked in also alarm.

"My bat senses are tingiling."

"Isn't Spiderman that one with the-"

"Shut up." He interrupted me, and quite rudely I might add.

AHHHHHH

"What in the hell is that?" I asked while covering my ears.

"Joker."He then ran off into the street, which wasn't very safe since he needs adult supervision.

"Hey, you're supposed to look left and the right in the street! " I lectured him while also following.

Midget ignored me and stopped at the end of the road to see two small children fighting. One was kicking the shit out the other one and laughed maniacally.