Ronan (Taylor Swift and One Direction)

Management and Niall

I was sitting on the couch crying at the show for about half an hour when Taylor came out ready. She looked at me with sympathy when she noticed me crying. She didn’t say anything. She had given up saying anything. The first two days I spent crying while Taylor tried to comfort me with words. 

Taylor has always been able to talk me out of my own depression. I used to have depression issues when I first had Ronan. All worried about having a child. And the things that could go wrong with the pregnancy. And my parents diss-owning me and so on and Taylor had been the only one who was able to settle me down and help me. 

She has always been my best friend. We went to school together, danced together in the same classes at our school and we used to make up routine’s when we were bored on the weekends or something, we even went on double dates with our boyfriends and stuff. We are that close. It’s just loosing my little boy had been the hardest thing I have ever done. 

I haven’t told my parents yet. I can’t bring myself to call the people who diss-owned me because of my dearest child and tell them that he was gone. No way. 

Dancing was Taylor and my way of getting away from everyone and everything. Our way of getting lost in our own world. But she was also always a good singer, me not so much. 

‘Abigail? Abbi? Hello?’ Taylor called waving her hand in front of my face. 

‘Sorry. Did you say something?’ I asked. I had zoned out for a while then. 

‘No, you just sort of looked paralyzed and I wondered if something was wrong. But we do really need to leave. Come on.’ She said. ‘When we get back we can dance or something if you want if it will take your mind of it’

‘That would be amazing.’ I answered following her out the door of our little apartment in L.A. We had bought this because we didn’t want to buy something big and then never be there. So we bought this cosy place to be home for Ronan. It wasn’t really that small, it had heaps of rooms. One for Taylor, me, Ronan and a spare one for us to dance. A kitchen, living room and 2 bathrooms. It was pretty awesome.

I zoned out the whole car trip. Just missing Ronan’s happy voice, asking a million questions. 

‘Abbi... We’re here. You can stay in the car if you want...’ She said with a sad look. I think she is worried about me. 

‘No, I want to come in’ I said as I unbuckled myself and got out of the car. Taylor did the same and then locked the car. 

‘I think they are going to ask what we want the press to know about Ronan. People do know you had a child but you can tell them something different from what really happened if you want.’ Taylor warned me. I gave her a thankful look but shook my head. 

‘I want them to know the truth. I don’t want to lie about my son’ I told her. 

We walked into the meeting room with all of our management seated there as well as five other boys. I had a faint idea who they were but I didn’t want to jump to conclusions if I wasn’t right. They did look like the five boys of One Direction. 

‘Ah, Taylor you’re here. And you brought Abigail. Perfect.’ Tim, Taylor’s manager, sighed. I think Simon Cowel was sitting next to him. 

‘Taylor and Abigail this is Harry, Liam, Niall, Louis and Zayn from One Direction if you didn’t already know.’ The guy I was pretty sure was Simon spoke up. 

I waved a hello to them suddenly feeling a little self-conscious from my no make up and lazy day clothes. I didn’t smile at them. I couldn’t summon enough feeling to smile at them.