Trilogy: Two Siblings, a husband and a grandchild

Part 33

Your POV:
Richmond Park was packed. Parents with their children riding bikes, dogs running after their ball, families catching up. It was lovely to see. But I also found it sad. It felt like, in order to see our family, we had to go for our 1 hour of exercise.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Jamie chuckled.
"Sorry. Just amazes me how we've got to use our 1 hour exercise to see our families".
"I know. It sucks" he replied.
"Sorry. Didn't mean to be depressing. How have you been?".
"You're not being depressing. I've been thinking the same thing"
I smiled.
"I have been good thank you. Tired as the girls are hyper as anything!" He spoke.
"Oh I bet! They are happy that their Dad is home I expect!"
"Oh no. Amelia is definitely their favourite" he chuckled.
"I can't wait to meet them"

It was true. Jamie sent us all pictures of them and they are gorgeous. Their smiles are just like Jamie's and they remind me of Mum's too.

"I've told them all about their Auntie's and Uncle. They know I'm with you today. Actually, they gave me this to give to you".
Jamie pulled out a picture.
I took it from him and studied it. It was a drawing of, who I presumed, was Dulcie, Alberta, Elva and Me.
"Oh Jamie, this is gorgeous".
I was tearing up.
"Since I told them, they haven't stopped talking about you all. I've shown them pictures of you all and they are in love. Especially Elva. She keeps asking about Jack"
"Bless her. Hopefully soon we can all meet up" I said, sliding the picture carefully into my bag.
"Hope so. Anyway, how have you been?" He asked.
"Good. Homeschooling sucks. Quite nice to be back at work and leave Tom to do it" I laughed.
"Bet he loves you for that!"
"He prefers it. He was annoyed when I would say I'd do it. I suppose he just wants to take the stress away"
"What do you mean?"
"I haven't been sleeping properly for months. Since well, you know" I whispered.

I didn't want Jamie to think I was struggling but I wanted to tell him too. It mustn't be easy for him either.

"I know. It must have been a shock. Mum keeps trying to get in contact but I can't bring myself to answer" he admitted.
"Oh"
"Has she tried to get into contact with you?"
"Um... yes she has. We've been messaging back and forth. The truth is..." I stopped. Could I really tell him and risk loosing him?
"Go on" he encouraged.
"I don't think I can let her go again"
I looked up and Jamie had stopped.
"I'm not saying I can forgive her. I don't think I will, but I can't stop speaking to her"
"I get it"
"Do you?" I asked.

We had now found a bench. The sun was beaming on us.

"I keep thinking how it must feel to be her. Having none of her kids speak to her. She's alone is Australia", he continued, "Amelia keeps telling me to give her a chance. I want to, I do, but I can't risk losing my family that I've only just found"
"You won't lose us. Well not me anyway. Harrison and Charlotte don't know that I still speak to her. When they do, an argument will break out, but it's the risk I'm going to take because it feels right".
"I agree"
"I just want everything to go back to the way it was. I always blame myself because everything fell apart when I got pregnant with Elodie" I spoke.
"It isn't your fault. None of this is" Jamie spoke, placing a hand on my knee. He then quickly took it off.
"Sorry, that wasn't Covid friendly" he chuckled.
"It's okay. It was comforting" I smiled.
"We can tell Harrison and Charlotte together? I don't think they will kick off, but if they do, I will be right there beside you" Jamie spoke.
"I'd like that".
I just hoped they'd be okay. I was falling apart as it was, and I didn't know how much longer I was going to last.