collateral damage 🔞 - COMPLETE

•ten• before

~~~~~Haerin

It has been exactly one month... One month ago my world stopped turning. I get up every day, but don't have the will to do anything. Most days, I don't even bathe. I eat small meals just to stop the hunger pains. Most of the time, I end up throwing it all up anyway. I wander around my huge mansion, remembering the times when I was happy here. After every good memory, comes an overwhelming feeling of loneliness. They're gone... They aren't coming back...

This morning I'm feeling so sick. Naeun Unnie comes to my room to find me laying in bed crying... again. She sets the tray with some soup on the bedside table and checks my forehead for fever. When she finds I don't have one, she drags me into a seated position.

"Miss Haerin... You need to eat more... I made this soup, and I know for a fact it's one of your favorites. Please... Eat!"

I feel guilty that she has to beg me to consume food. I know that she would rather be doing any number of other things right now, but I'm being a brat. To not cause her any more distress, I take the bowl, and spoon up some of the corn soup. It is hot, and feels silky on my tongue. I hum in pleasure as it warms me up from the inside.

"It's good Unnie. Thank you."

I continue to eat the delicious meal, and watch my Unnie. She seems to be trying to decide something. If thinking had a face, Naeun Unnie would be a great example of it right now. I eat slowly since I am afraid to end up with the lovely soup in the toilet. My whole body relaxes for the first time in a while, but Unnie is clearly not.

"What's wrong Unnie?"

I set the spoon in the bowl and hold it, letting it warm my hands as I wait for her to speak. Whatever it is, must really be a big deal. She usually tells me exactly what she's thinking, good or bad.

"Your parents are coming tomorrow. They called and said that they would be here to plan your wedding."

She doesn't meet my eyes, and I know she is feeling sorry for my situation. My appetite is gone now, so I set the bowl back on the tray. I grab the pink hippo and cuddle it to me, letting the tears flow.

"What am I supposed to do? I don't want to marry that man Unnie... He's gross!"

My childish rant makes Naeun Unnie chuckle. I squeeze the hippo closer, and imagine it still smells like Jeongguk. He had sprayed it with his cologne before he gifted it to me. But now, the smell is gone... Just like he is...

"I don't know Miss Haerin... I wish I had an answer for you."

When my tears start to choke me, I run to the bathroom. The glorious, tasty soup is now flowing out of my mouth into the toilet. I feel Naeun Unnie's hand on my back, rubbing up and down. I sob after I'm done evacuating my stomach. Collapsing onto the floor, I curl into a ball lamenting my miserable existence.

"I'll just kill myself Unnie... I won't marry that pedophile! If they force me, I'd rather die!'

She shushes me, and takes a damp washcloth to clean my face. I cry loud and ugly for a long time. How could they do this to me? My parents have been absent my whole life... Do they want to be rid of me, and their responsibility, so badly that they'd really 'sell me' to an old man for their business? Another wave of nausea strikes and I hover over the toilet heaving with nothing coming out.

After a while, I must have passed out. When I awoke, I was in a bed attached to monitors and an IV drip. I sat up in a panic only to have my head explode. I groan and clutch my hair trying to figure out what happened. When I'm about to get up from the bed, the door opens and Naeun Unnie comes in, followed by a doctor.