Twinkling Lights

Chapter 1

******SO LIKE I GOT SUPER INSPIRED LATELY AND DECIDED TO WRITE THIS STORY. HOPE YOU LIKE IT.******

*****THIS STORY IS GOING TO BE WRITTEN IN YAMAGUCHI'S POV. IM TRYIN SOMETHING NEW.*****
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Clear gloss, light dusted rose, black liquid eyeliner, lightly coated foundation, and black thick mascara to top it off.

I look myself in the mirror and smile at my masterpiece. These are the rare times, when I actually feel comfortable and happy with makeup on. Don't get me wrong, I like makeup in general cause it's cute, not cause I want to cover up my imperfections. Well, kinda that too, but I'm tryin to work on being more positive.

I pack my makeup away and hide it in the very back of my bottom drawer. I sigh softly and look back into the mirror. You can barely see my freckles today. Before I could over analyze myself, I pull out a container from my top drawer, which is filled with stickers. I place a couple candy stickers and one or two black heart stickers.

I smile at myself and then place my container back where it belongs. I skip out of the bathroom and into my messy room. I really should try cleaning it more often. Oh well, a problem for another day.

I pulled out my school uniform, frowning as I glanced at it. Male uniform. I don't mind wearing it most of the time or really thinking about which uniform it is. It's just....

I'm feeling like a girl today that's all. I know that might seem odd and unnatural to most, but I can't really explain it. Some weeks I'll feel more feminine, other weeks I'm more masculine, and most of the time I'm neither.

[any thing italicized are thoughts just FYI]

Also, I don't have definite pronouns, they change according to my 'gender' that week. I do prefer they/them most of all though, it feels safe. I have tried putting a label on this, but I don't really refer to 'gender fluid' since no one has asked so far.

I feel bad sometimes, since I haven't told anyone, even Tsukki. On my bad days, I wish I could tell him, but I can't. Not yet.

I finish throwing on my uniform and shuffled down the stairs while putting in my earrings and piercing pieces. I had just got my latest piercing on my lip just last week.

My parents don't care about whether I wear makeup or have piercings because they think this is a "phase". As if. Yes, mr. and mrs. Yamaguchi, your son is definitely not bisexual and not gender conforming. Makes me laugh sometimes.

I make myself some toast and grab a banana to go. I pull on a pinkish puffy jacket and slip on my worn out white sneakers. I grab my bag and yell a goodbye to my mom before walking out the door.

I waited at the corner near Tsukki's street, where there was a convenience store. I had brought a bento this time, so I don't have buy one again. I fidget with my hands and look at my feet. It had been raining lately and was starting to get pretty cold.

I hear footsteps approaching, but don't look up until I hear them stop in front of me with a casual sigh.

"G'morning Tsukki!" I exclaim with a gentle smile.

"Morning, Yamaguchi. We just gonna stand around, or are we going to head out soon?" His voice is a little gentler today, but also kinda off.

"Hmm. Yeah, we can head out right now. It's just a little cold, so I was trying to warm up a bit."

He hums in response and starts to walk towards school with me by his side. I couldn't help, but stare at his side profile and cute overgrown blond curls. He hasn't cut his hair for a while, and his uniform is messily put on. Is it one of those times again? I stop walking and glance down in contemplation.

I'm trying to think of what to say next and what words to use as to not trigger Tsukki. I felt a hand tug my shoulder gently. I look up and find myself matching his gaze.

"Let's go, Yamaguchi. We can't be late to practice." He says gently again.

"What's wrong? Are you feeling bad again? Do you want to skip practice today? How about we hang out after school at your house. I can bring over snacks, and we can watch a movie."

"I-I'm fine....but you can come over if you want. I wouldn't mind..."

"Alrighty! I'll bring some strawberry cake too!"

He seems to brighten up by my concern and also the mention of cake. He nods and we continue heading to school. I hold onto the sleeve of his coat and squeeze it slightly. I do this quite often, ever since we were kids. It seems to calm him down and it makes me happy.

We head to the club room once making it to school. We start changing until a human tangerine walks in jumping up and down, followed by a grumpy Kageyama.

"Hi Yamaguchi! Hi saltyshima! Wow! You're lookin like a mop now, Tsukki~"

I giggle at the statement because it's humorous, when Hinata triggers Tsukki on purpose. Tsukki glares at him and snarls something back.

"Oh, my bad I didn't realize a short ass rat popped in. Have you told the king over there why you're constantly walking to and from school yet? Or should I accidentally let it slip. And don't call me Tsukki. Shrimpy~"

They end up bickering for a while. I couldn't help, but laugh in the background. We head to practice eventually. So, people notice my new piercing and stickers. They compliment me, while I shy away and start my float serve practices.

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-TIME SKIP TO AFTER SCHOOL AT TSUKKI'S HOUSE-
I place the slice of strawberry cake in the fridge for later. I walk upstairs and into Tsukki's room. I find him laying on the floor staring at nothing in particularly. I sigh and slump down to the floor with him.

"Hey, Tsukki~ What's wrong? You know you can tell me anything. I can't help you, if you don't tell me what's wrong." I nudge him slightly.

Without moving his gaze, he scoots closer and presses up against me. I smile and nudge into him.

"I'm just feeling under the weather. Nothing bad. Just....down. Don't worry about me."

"Okay. But seriously if you need anything or to just talk. I'm always here."

"C-can you tell me stuff about you. It always seems to keep my mind off things. Just like tell me about your fondness for makeup or cute things or French fries."

I think for a bit, deciding whether to tell his my secret or not. I take a deep breathe and decide to tell him. I've been putting it off for a while, And I shouldn't feel this anxious. Tsukki is gay after all. He's out and not afraid to hide it and he knows I'm bi. So, he wouldn't think I'm weird right?

I sit up and turn away from him, leaning my knees into my chest. Tsukki seems to feel something off and sits up as well. I can feel his eyes directed at me with his full attention.

"Well, there has been something I've been wanting to tell you for a while actually."

He hummed in response, letting me know he's listening. I decide to just blurt it out.

"Hey, Tsukki, I'm not a boy."

"That's okay, Yamaguchi."

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*****HOPE YOU ENJOYED*****

*****I WILL TRY TO POST EVERY WEEK. SO STAY TUNED.*****